Stand Afar or Take a Chance
by So Yun
Summary: Marauder's EraTime Travel Fic In the Final Battle, nearly everyone Harry loves is dead. But his mentor, Snape has one last chance to save him. To send him into the past where Harry was his friend as well as James Potter's.
1. Part 1 Section I:I remember You

AN/: Usual disclaimed and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part one, Section I**

I Remember You

See the stone set in your eyes  
See the thorn twist in your side  
I wait for you-With or Without you, U2.

**--------------------------------------------**

**Prologue**

Frantically, Harry stumbled; loosing all sense of time and momentum as the ground tilted underneath him. He had to reach them, but his own body's disorientation stopped him; he could scream in frustration but his shredded vocal chords would not allow it.

The ground was thick sludge, mud, leaves, rotting bodies. His feet seemed to be glued into the earth. It was quiet though, like a graveyard and the wind whipped around his. Dislodging his ebony hair that was plastered to his sweat covered face.

Crusted blood stood starkly against his pale, deathly pale skin. Black and purple hued bruises marred his cheek bones prominently and his lips moved silently; gasping for more air.

His feet stumbled forth at a deathly rate and he felt as though he would never get there. Suddenly the whole world tilted up towards his face in a rush. He hit it with a crunch and he immediately felt pain fill his bones.

His eyelids felt like iron doors, willing to shut. He shuddered against them; he would not let them die. But they shut with a crunch and the room he entered was black.

------------------------------------------------

_June, 1997_

The war had been going for some time now. During Harry's sixth year Wizarding war broke loose and pandemonium was rank in the world. Dumbledore lead the Light side and Voldemort the Dark. Hogwart's students were openly recruited as soldiers for the Light and havoc ran across the country.

The Ministry was in shambles and the Dementors of Azkaban recruited for the Dark along with many numerous other species of creature.

The Order was at full force with near one hundred members making peace to join. The Aurors of the Ministry fought for their families and their country.

Creatures of the Dark run amuck, killing, eating, sensing mudblood families. The Dark Lord himself, Voldemort tortured muggles and light side who were captured on a regular basis, to insanity.

News of slaughter ran through the country, spinning a web of fear around the Wizarding community of Britain and Europe alike.

The Dark killed and plundered anything they could; everyone knew the final battle for the Wizarding world's fate was drawing closer. They all knew that the fate of their world also rested on one sixteen year old boy's shoulders.

Harry James Potter.

"What mood is he in today Miss Granger?" Professor Snape's tone is nothing but a hint of concern. Hermione shook her head; they both knew that Harry's mood determined the day.

"He's not good, I couldn't get him out of bed today," She said solemnly but looked up quickly to give her professor a pointed look.

"Don't be too harsh, he was looking through his photo album, there…there was one of Ron and him flying…I-I guess it triggered…." She trailed off and sat down exhausted.

Snape merely nodded and went to leave, but her next comment made him pause, "Just do what you must Professor Snape, pull Harry out of this. I know you can."

Snape nodded grimly then entered the teen's tend, pulling the door aside roughly and hissing loudly, "Mister Potter!"

He strode over the still lump under the ragged sheets on the make shift mattress in the corner. He bent down and forcefully yanked the sheets of the huddled boy and then stood up right, with his arms crossed.

He watched as the ebony haired teen turned over roughly and groaned, not wanting to open his eyes. He lent forward again and took the bare shoulders of Harry, shaking them as hard as he could.

The teen's dull orbs opened slowly and he moaned, looking away from the agitated face of his professor.

"Not today, Snape." He mumbled, turning over without looking once at the older man.

Snape's face gradually become calmer, but he growled under his breath. He relented and knelt down beside the make shift bed and put a gentle hand on the boy's back.

"You cannot just try to forget Mr Weasley, you also cannot be afraid to remember him Harry," His tone was gentle and soothing, but Harry remained ignoring him, or at least trying.

"You may pretend I do not exist but you _will _heed my words. Do not let your grief destroy you."

After that sentiment he stood up and left briskly, Harry turned around afterwards and got up, joining Hermione for breakfast.

"How is Mister Potter today, Miss Granger?" His mellow, deep voice startled Hermione and she whipped around, a grin on her face. It lit her whole appearance up and she nodded with a wane, close lipped smile.

"Oh professor Snape, he is happy today. He won't stop smiling and he actually played a game of exploding snap with me! He's also talking a lot and-"

Snape never stuck around to hear the rest as he rushed off towards Harry's tent, his robes billowing. Hermione was left behind, her mouth agape, the smile having slipped off her face completely.

"Oh no…how could I not see it…" She murmured to herself and sat down, not bothering to follow Snape. She knew she wouldn't be any help.

Snape rounded the tent and sighed disappointedly as he found Harry, kneeling behind his tent vomiting his entire stomach up. Snape bent down and peered into Harry's eyes as the teen looked at him. Harry could sense the disappointment the man was at him, he wiped his mouth and waited.

"I was wondering why some of my ingredients were missing. I should have known you would try and make another mood altering potion, I cannot believe I missed that…" The man was murmuring to himself, looking away from Harry which filled him up with sadness.

Harry bowed his head and sobbed, he was sobbing quietly for a moment before Snape noticed. He knelt beside Harry and lifted the teenager's chin lightly, "Promise me you won't do it again. Only you can bring yourself out of this depression. Potter, this is war."

Harry nodded, carefully looking in the older man's obsidian depths to show he was telling the truth. He couldn't bear to disappoint the man again, ever.

He felt he did not deserve his kindness.

"Mr Potter, you are awake early," Harry turned and nodded at the voice. He smiled faintly at Snape before continuing to stare at the horizon.

"I slept well Professor Snape. Ron …Ron-he came to me in my dreams, he forgave me," The teen said softly, acknowledging the gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Forgiveness is all we need sometimes Mr Potter, I am glad you are adequately and sufficiently in a good mood today. I do believe Miss Granger has cooked pancakes this morning,"

Harry grinned, smiling at his professor, "Sometimes I wish Dobby were here…Hermione's cooking is well….ah….atrocious,"

Snape had a faint trace of a smile as he retracted his hand, "Better not let Miss Granger hear you say that."

The boy actually giggled as Snape led him away to kitchen tent. Sometimes he was quite happy to see the boy act in childishness; it was refreshing. He felt very contented in that moment. It seemed that maybe Harry was healing.

Harry had turned Snape into a better man even if the elder man loathed admitting it. But Harry openly admitted that Snape had changed him, for the good.

"Harry! Harry!" Someone was practically screeching his name and he rolled over to his side and blearily opened his eyes. Hermione's face swam into view and he sat up slowly, rubbing grit from his eyes as he did so.

Her disapproving stare penetrated his defences and he looked back at her softly, "The battle is about to begin isn't it?"

Hermione's eyes softened and she nodded at him; sitting beside him she created a dip into the makeshift mattress. Her soft brown eyes were swimming with unshed tears as she buried her face in his broad shoulder.

He stiffly put his arm around her shoulder and rubbed it comfortingly.

She softly sobbed then pulled back, staring at him through her tear glazed eyes.

"Don't do anything stupid Harry, please. I can't lose you too…not after-after Ron,"

Harry closed his eyes as she whispered his deceased best mate. He didn't and couldn't speak of him, it was far too painful. He felt as if he had been doused in icy cold water and he was drowning in it as it swallowed him.

The Golden trio had been ripped apart in a small battle just a month ago, Ron had gone and stupidly scouted ahead without his buddy, Harry. By the time they had fended off the attack from around the camp, they had found Ron's lifeless body lying under a bush.

Thank god he had died an unpainful death with just one Avada Kedavra; nothing more; nothing less.

Harry nodded dimly and got up, pulling on a robe and checking his wand holster. Hermione watched as he gathered his things he would need for the battle.

They both knew in their hearts that this was not just a petty battle between a handful of Deatheaters and Order members.

This was the full scale attack from both sides, the battle that would finish the war.

The war had begun at a time when Harry was growing up. He and his peers had grown up in the desolate times of despair and a glimpse of hope. It had made them seem older, colder and weary. It changed them from the bright happy students who laughed and smiled all the time at Hogwarts.

They would never be the same.

They had lost classmates, peers, elders, role models, relatives, family.

The Order of the Phoenix had its losses too; Ronald Weasley was just one of the many. Colin Creevey would never click away with his camera of his, being accidentally impaled by a gate fence when he was running away to protect his brother Dennis.

His brother saw it all and had been comatose for weeks now.

Fred Weasley had seen his twin tortured to death on one of the Deatheater raids; he had been hapless and now he was stony, silent; without his twin, without his brethren.

The Weasley's had lost many of their children; no one could reach Molly Weasley anymore, too catatonic in her grief, a total loss of four children out of seven.

Percy's soul was sucked out by a Dementor as he went to save his father, Arthur Weasley cradled his son's lifeless body as he cried, and wailed into the dawn sky, murmuring that it had been his entire fault.

Ginerva Weasley was killed all too familiarly by a green light as she streaked across the battle ground at the Ministry, which had fallen a day ago to heal the wounded. They had found her body buried under a mound piled up by the fountain.

Remus was watched over by Kingsley Shacklebolt in a large tent; he hadn't spoken or moved since Nymphadora Tonk's death on the battlefield of Stonehenge a day earlier.

The Light side was failing and they all knew it. They were becoming overwhelmed by the creatures of the Dark and Voldemort's minions. People were giving up, people were Avada Kedvra-ing themselves, alone in their tents; their family and friends gone or dead.

People were drinking themselves to oblivion as they stumbled out of the battle grounded, to inebriate to care.

Dumbledore, leader of the light army was also becoming weary. He trudged on day after day, but people could see soon he would not be able to move forwards anymore. Professor Minerva McGonagall stayed by his side as a faithful lieutenant.

Professor Severus Snape helped to collaborate attacks on the Dark side's weak spots. He was no longer undercover, him having been caught saving the Dark Lord's nemesis.

Harry had been captured by Deatheaters when he had stumbled into their trap at the old Riddle Mansion. They had tipped off Snape that that's where they were hiding the last Horcrux. Snape in turn told Harry and he blindly stumbled into the trap.

He was captured for three months and tortured endlessly. His screams and blood were rank upon the dungeons of the Voldemort's lair. Snape carried him out, carried in the teen's blood and left him at Order head quarters.

It was a pity Lucius Malfoy saw him taking Harry, he immediately reported to the Dark Lord.

Snape never went back to his previous master and never would. He continued working for the Order, brewing enough healing draughts for the army and pinpointing precise attacks.

He also became Harry's mentor. Somehow, after he rescued him they forged a bond. Ron had been incredulous of it before he died; for that, Harry resented him even if he was dead.

Hermione and Remus had been quite happy about it and congratulated the two on putting aside their differences. But that had been before Tonks and Ron had been killed.

Everything changed after death, whether grief overcame you or it changed your perspectives. Death could and would destroy you if you let it.

--------------------------------------------

Hermione and Harry made their way outside and stood in front of the tent flaps, surveying the destruction around them. Hundreds of the Light side aurors and fighters stood idle around their own tents, some loitering round common places talking quietly among themselves.

For such a large camp, it was far too quiet.

Then Harry swivelled around swiftly when he sensed someone's presence beside them, closer then everyone else.

Months of strenuous training on the battlefield had taught him a lot of things.

He found himself face to face, wand to wand, with Snape who looked grim. Harry and Hermione nodded at him and he put down his wand, pocketing it.

"The Dark Lord's army has mobilized and is making their way here by-foot. They will be here within the hour, are you both ready? Miss Granger? Mr Potter?"

His deep voice penetrated them and they both nodded, they were nervous and Snape could sense it. As Hermione left to get the med witch supplies ready, Snape put a gentle hand on Harry's shoulder.

"Do not be afraid Potter. As Albus has said, death is the next greatest adventure. You are in pain, terrible pain. Though you have not let your grief completely overcome you and I am proud of you for that Mister Potter," The older man commended the still teen then turned and left.

Harry leaned against the kitchen tents posted idly, twiddling his wand in his now trembling fingers. Fine tremors ran thought his knuckles and his hands shook lightly. He had always wondered if it was because of the war he had acquired it. He was only sixteen for Merlin's sake.

He always hated looking at his reflection in anything, a spoon, a mirror, a bowl of water. He had seen his reflection once and that was enough. His eyes were no longer brilliant emerald; they were a dull, empty, pained green now. Almost swallowed by the blank look he always stared.

His skin was gaunt and pale, dark rings lay under his eyes making him look like some morbid zombie from a nightmare. He now looked older than he should have, he felt older.

He did not know how long he stood there but he was calmly startled when he heard drums in the distance. Someone nearby sent up a siren spell and suddenly the Light camp was a flurry of movement.

People were scrambling into formations to the forefront of the camp, past Dumbledore's tent and onto the stretching plain that they would use as a battlefield.

People flooded from everywhere, Harry and Hermione recognised their peers, people from the Ministry and Order members. They followed the flood of people until they stood on the forefront of the battle line.

In the distance black specs could be seen marching towards them, gruelling creatures flanking Voldemort's massive army. Dementors floated in the distance, ready to suck out the souls of remaining innocents after the battle was won.

Wild werewolves strayed, growling and clawing, eager to eat.

A mass of Deatheaters stood in a large formation; all wearing the terrifying porcelain face masks that obscured their appearance. They looked morbidly beautiful amidst the barren battle plain.

Voldemort himself could not be seen. Harry growled quietly and tightened his grip on his wand.

This was the last stand.

Voldemort was going to die even if it meant taking Harry's life with him.

No one saw who threw the first curse but it someone on the Light side. Dumbledore merely closed his eyes gently then launched himself into the battle. Everyone followed.

Harry soon found himself buried in the turmoil of war. Hexes and curses sizzling the air, sounds thick and heavy. Laboured breathing, screams of pain and anguish, thuds, snarls, yelling. But Harry ploughed on, felling anything or anyone in his path.

He had destroyed the last horcrux weeks ago, a few days before Ron died. Voldemort was mortal now and he knew it. Harry just had to find him first.

Harry beaten a couple of times when many Deatheaters surrounded him; but still he managed to get back up and fell them with a few curses. Many unguarded Crucios had managed to hit him, but he had just gritted his teeth and ploughed on.

He hadn't seen anyone he knew for awhile now, in the back of his mind was worry but in forefront he was hungry to beat Voldemort for once and for all.

The battle played on for hours, Harry soon found himself stumbling over mangled corpses of his peers and people he knew. The battle was dying down and Harry was becoming weaker, he did not know what he was going to do, almost all of the light side was felled with a large majority of the Dark.

But still Harry fought on.

Soon the armies were thinning and Harry noticed a crimson robes figure standing, silent, still in the midst of the fighting. He had his back to Harry, but he could see the man's skin looked horrible, distorted, rotting.

Tom Marvolo Riddle, looked old, looked mortal.

Harry tightened his grip on his wand before striding up the to figure and hissing out his name, "Tom, good to see you have actually shown up,"

The ugly, horrible man turned around and his red, slitted eyes narrowed as he noticed Harry. But instead of simpering on about the annoyance of Harry calling him by his _muggle _name, he merely smirked.

Harry felt a sense of dread before he lifted his wand; now or never.

"Avada Ked-"

He never finished the sentence because he was thrown off his feet by a powerful blast exhibited from Voldemort. Harry breathed shallowly as he fought his way to his feet again. It would do no good to be on the ground as Voldemort killed him.

He lifted his wand, but nearly lowered it when he heard a loud cackling laughter surrounding him. He eyes Voldemort carefully.

"_Thissss issss the end, Haaary Potter_." Voldemort hissed in pure delight through parseltongue at Harry and lifted his wand, training it on the teen's heart.

Harry took this moment of stillness to rip the melted knife that Sirius had given him a year ago and lunged forth.

It seemed that time paused as Harry plunged the melted, but sharp blade into Voldemort's chest. Harry watched in blank satisfaction at the look of shock on the ugly man's face as rivulets of blood dripped from the wound.

Then the man fell, face first, driving the blade even further into his stone, cold heart.

Harry got over his shock and checked the man's pulse, flinching at having to touch him. Voldemort was dead.

Suddenly the battlefield seemed so indefinitely quiet. Lone figures stumbled and fell; soon Harry was the only one standing. Moans of agonised pain reached his ears and he felt a sudden coldness gripping at his heart.

_The Dementors…_

Hermione, Remus, Dumbledore, The Weasley's, The Order, Professor Snape…

Frantically, Harry stumbled; loosing all sense of time and momentum as the ground tilted underneath him. He had to reach them, but his own body's disorientation stopped him; he could scream in frustration but his shredded vocal chords would not allow it.

The ground was thick sludge, mud, leaves, rotting bodies. His feet seemed to be glued into the earth. It was quiet though, like a graveyard and the wind whipped around his. Dislodging his ebony hair that was plastered to his sweat covered face.

Crusted blood stood starkly against his pale, deathly pale skin. Black and purple hued bruises marred his cheek bones prominently and his lips moved silently; gasping for more air.

His feet stumbled forth at a deathly rate and he felt as though he would never get there. Suddenly the whole world tilted up towards his face in a rush. He hit it with a crunch and he immediately felt pain fill his bones.

His eyelids felt like iron doors, willing to shut. He shuddered against them; he would not let them die. But they shut with a crunch and the room he entered was black.

--------------------------------------------

Severus Snape crawled in an undignified manner across the sloping plains of decaying bodies and mud towards the teen. He could feel, to his horror coldness seeping into his mind and heart. He was running out of time…

He had seen the last stand between his previous master and Harry, he had seen the way the teen had killed the Dark Lord. But he also felt extremely proud and gleeful, but then Potter had collapsed as the Dementors closed in.

He struggled across fallen bodies and injured aurors, moaning and groaning. No one was going to save them now. Snape knew in his heart if he could save anyone it would be Harry.

He knew that he; himself was destined to die along with the many other helpless dozens unable to move as the soul stealers moved closer. Finally he was near Harry and he struggled closer on his elbows and stomach.

Snape could feel warm blood seeping through his lips and his side was on fire. He struggled to pull the chain off from around his neck as it tangled into his dirty hair. He breathed harshly and wheezed as it finally slid off.

He used both of his long fingered hands to placed the golden chain over the unconscious boy's head and onto his neck. He gently lifted Harry's head and slipped it on then closed his eyes as he began to slowly turn the winder backwards.

It was a slow and strenuous task; finally he breathed a sigh as he finished winding the twenty first turn. He wheezed then whispered quietly into Harry's year, "Be in peace Mr Potter, I still remember you. You were and are my friend. Goodbye."

In a flash of light Harry disappeared, Severus Snape collapsed heavily against the ground. He found himself moaning loudly as the coldness covered him, the ground turned into icicles.

He could hear distant screaming of the people who had survived before a sweeping figure began to extricate his soul. His obsidian eyes widened slightly before dying into a dull, blank look.

He was as good as dead.

"_Goodbye."_

--------------------------------------------

**To be continued…**

I know, I know, I've started another story again…sorry but I couldn't kill the plot bunnies!

This is my first shot at a Time travelling and/or Marauder Era story, so please be gentle**! It isn't mentioned in the summary, but apart from Snape, Harry will also become good friends with the Marauders!**

Also, if I have any of the dates wrong, please tell! I got very confused until I worked it out!

Please review (yes the little button down in the left hand corner, press "Go")

Thanks, till next time (Hopefully soon)

Yun


	2. Part 1 Section II:Who are you? Who am I?

AN/: Usual disclaimed and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all. I also changed Lucius Malfoy's age, hope you don't mind! NOT SLASH.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part one, Section II**

Who are you? Who am I?

Slide of hand and twist of fate  
On a bed of nails he makes me wait  
And I wait without you-With or Without you, U2.

_It was a slow and strenuous task; finally he breathed a sigh as he finished winding the twenty first turn. He wheezed then whispered quietly into Harry's year, "Be in peace Mr Potter, I still remember you. You were and are my friend. Goodbye."_

**--------------------------------------------**

_June, 1976_

"Now, I do believe that we should remedy some sort of…plan to maybe…bring James Potter and Severus Snape…together. Their animosity for each other has gone on for far too long, I believe if we form a neutral friendship or acquaintance between them, Sirius Black shall follow James,"

Dumbledore surveyed his transfiguration professor through his half moon glasses; she after all, was their head of house.

Minerva nodded slightly, but her lips were pressed in a thin line, "Are you sure you can make them Albus? James and Mr Snape are both particularly stubborn young men. It is their final year…maybe we should just leave it be,"

Dumbledore vaguely nodded; a faint trace of a smile on his lips, "Well I am sure Miss Evans will hold her partner in crime back from getting in too deep of trouble. I mean she and James must uphold their Head Boy and Girl duties,"

"Indeed Headmaster, sometimes I think we made a wrong choice in choosing James. Perhaps Remus Lupin may have been a better choice…"

Dumbledore turned to her in mock confusion, "Why yes he probably would have, young Mr Lupin. But the poor boy and his condition…"

"Ah yes headmaster, I truly feel for him. It must be hard concealing it from his friends for so long…"

The two stood in comfortable silence before Dumbledore stared down at his pocket watch, "Well we best go in. I'm sure that most House quidditch teams would be appalled that we are trampling their ground's beautiful grass…"

"Albus-"Minerva began with mirth in her tone, "You do realize that quidditch involves flying, you don't even play on the grass…"

She was interrupted by the headmaster's rumble of laughter, Minerva merely rolled her eyes and began to follow him back inside.

As they returned to the castle, night fell bringing a cold chill with it, they never noticed a flash of light behind them. Or the broken body of a sixteen year old boy lying, crumpled in a heap on the grass.

**--------------------------------------------**

"Shhh Peter! You aren't even going to fly tonight are you! Remus would rather study, so why don't you go hang out with him? James and I, on the other hand want to," The sixteen year old Sirius Black whispered loudly as they passed through the courtyard, broom in hand.

Sixteen year old Peter Pettigrew followed on along behind them, James Potter walking briskly under the moonlight. Peter whined then relented, "Fine then, I'll go hang out with Remus. What fun is flying anyway…" He mumbled dejectedly before turning off, leaving the other two.

"Can't wait to fly Padfoot?" James asked playfully as they finally came out into the open expanse of the Hogwarts grounds.

"Of course not mate! We won't get to fly on this beauty until after the holidays,"

James nodded vigorously, his raven hair flyaway and his glasses firmly stuck on his nose. His hazel eyes were alight with excitement and he sprinted the rest of the way to the pitch.

"Merlin, we wouldn't want good old Evans to catch us now would we? I mean she would do anything just to get your Head Boy badge taken away before you even get it, imagine that!" Sirius said breathily as he followed on behind.

"In her dreams Padfoot! She's just jealous because she knows McGonagall hinted to me before I got the letter and now she gets to patrol with me, what a sexy beast I am!"

Sirius snorted as he caught up, and then bumped into his best friend as James stopped in front of the pitch.

"Whoa, it looks even better at night!"

They were just about to kick off when Sirius noticed something odd near the middle of the pitch.

"Wait Prongs! What's that?" He said loudly as he pointed at the lump on the grass. James got off his Shooting Star quickly and narrowed his eyes, attempting to see what the lump was.

"I dunno Padfoot," He said seriously, dropping his broom along side Sirius's and edging closer.

Sirius grabbed his arm and pulled out his wand, "Be careful James, we don't know what it is…"

James merely shrugged off his best friend's arm before moving closer, his curiosity was getting the better of him.

"_Lumos!_" His wand alight James could see every single feature of the lump laying on the grass. Sirius gasped behind him at what they could now, clearly see.

The lump was a boy, a mere teenager who looked their age, maybe even younger. Messy ebony hair was plastered to his pale forehead and dried blood caked it. His face was a mass of purple and black hued bruises, cuts and scars marring his deathly pale skin.

In the night chill the boy's fingertips and lips were tinted a deadly blue and his clothes were nothing more then rags. In his right hand they could see he fisted his wand and a pair of broken, shattered spectacles not unlike James's lay above his head.

His tattered black robes were lightly covering the boy, the two other teens could see him visibly shaking, shivering.

It took a full moment before James and Sirius sprang into action, kneeling down beside the other unconscious, injured teen and wrapping him in their own cloaks. They worked silently, carefully moving the teen's limbs until they were covered.

James frowned as he picked up the broken glasses and pocketed them, he turned to Sirius and whispered sharply, "We've got to get a Professor, can you run and find one?"

His best mate nodded and took one last look of concern at the injured stranger before running full pelt back to the castle.

James carefully pulled the other boy onto his lap for more warmth using his own body; he frowned and murmured, "Who are you? How did you get this way?"

**--------------------------------------------**

Sirius ran down numerous corridors, he wanted to get his head of house but her office very far away. He didn't know how badly hurt the teen they had found was; his main priority was to get help.

Suddenly he collided with something thin and wiry that went, "Oof!" quietly before the both of them falling to the ground. Sirius managed to, with dignity stumble back to his feet.

When he saw whom he had run into, his face scrunched and he hissed, "Snivellus," in the dark corridor.

The other teenager narrowed his youthful, obsidian eyes and scrutinised Sirius carefully. He opened his thin set lips to utter the other's name in disgust, "Black,"

Sirius trained his wand on the sixteen year old, greasy haired, Severus Snape before starting to walk backwards. He definitely did not trust the Slimy Slytherin with his back turned.

As he continued to walk backwards, Snape eyed him strangely, breaking the silence, "What on earth are you doing?!"

Severus Snape lowered his wand and continued to watch Sirius who finally replied, "I'm in a rush, and I don't have time for messing around…." With that he said, he whipped around hurriedly and started walking as fast as he could without suspicion.

But Snape could hear him mumbling about something on the quidditch pitch, so he didn't bother follow the other boy. Instead, he headed for the quidditch pitch.

Stumbling about the darkened hallways he managed to finally come out onto the vast expanse of the grounds and quidditch pitch. His eyes widened slightly under the moonlight as he recognised James Potter kneeling in the middle of the pitch.

For him, this seemed strange; Snape frowned and quietly moved closer.

As he did so, he soon realized that something or someone was being cradled in James Potter's lap. A twig snapped under Snape's shoe, James's head whipped around.

Snape watched as James's hazel eyes widened in the moonlight before scrunching back down in anger. The other boy clutched the stranger's body protectively to his chest before hissing, "Why the hell are you here?!"

Snape stepped forwards, totally ignoring what James had said. He moved closer, slowly, waning under the moonlight trying to distinguish who lay on James's lap.

James stared at him and pulled the unconscious person closer again, eyeing Snape angrily.

"Stay back! Snivellus! He's hurt badly and we don't need you sticking your greasy nose into this!" James barked angrily but quietly, though his voice echoing the grounds.

Still, Snape moved closer until he could distinguish a face. A gaunt, pale, high cheek boned face. Caked blood, dried on the boy's temple and black and purple bruises marring his delicate skin.

His eyelids shut, framed by thick eyelashes and unruly, dirty raven hair covering the other teen's forehead.

The stranger was wrapped up in two Gryffindor cloaks tightly, but he could see that the body was emaciated, wounded, somewhat broken.

His chest rose in shallow gasps passing through his parted, split thin lips.

James Potter's arms circled the stranger's body protectively, producing body heat to warm them. He could see the body shake, and shiver under the bundle of cloaks.

The boy looked no older then himself, even younger maybe. His face looked haunted weary, but at the same time, young, innocent; like his own and everyone else's in his year.

But to be honest, he looked terrible. He looked like he was on the stairway to death and James Potter, for once in his life looked helpless to save his charge he held.

Slowly Snape sidled over and kneeled beside them and checked the boy's temperature; James made no move to stop him except for a glare.

"What happened?" Snape asked softly, no snideness or animosity in his voice; just pure concern for this stranger who lay in the lap of his enemy.

James looked down, into the face of the unconscious stranger and managed blankly, "Sirius and I came out for a fly-" He shot Snape a look to see if the other teen would even think of telling anyone that, "-and we found him right here, he's seriously wounded. Sirius ran for help,"

Snape nodded and continued staring into the marred face of the stranger. He was startled out of his reverie when a wand light shone upon all three of them and they found themselves face to face with Professor Dumbledore and McGonagall.

In that split second a large gasp and grown of pain was heard; emitting from the mysterious, wounded stranger. Everyone turned to look at his now open eyes.

**--------------------------------------------**

Brilliant, emerald eyes now though with a blank, dull look, stared at them all; glazed in uncertainty. His mouth open, gaping, moving with no sounds and gaping for shallow breaths.

He looked like he was trying to focus on them but was giving up. The other five continued to stare back until Professor Dumbledore rushed to the stranger's side, kneeling beside him.

Professor McGonagall followed suit and they gently pushed the three young men back as they assessed the stranger carefully.

Sirius, Snape and James all stood back in shock not completely sure whether to stay or go. Though James had a defiant glint in his eyes, he did not want to leave his charge and by he looks of it, neither did Sirius.

They had found him; they would take care of him; whoever it was.

Snape looked confused and a flicker of concern passed through his sallow face. Who had done this to a poor teenager, just like them?

The three boys were so caught up in their thoughts that they only just noticed as their two teachers hovered the stranger away. They went to follow, but Professor Dumbledore turned around and said gravely, "We shall speak in the morning, go back to sleep boys,"

The three nodded obediently but James continued staring at the stranger until Sirius tugged him away.

Sleep would be hard to come for all three of them that night.

James groaned as sunlight pierced his eyes and turned over, clutching his blankets tighter, Remus and Peter both snoring away softly as they always.

He finally groaned again and sat up slowly before noticing the next bed's owner was wide away and sitting up. His clean, long, black hair ruffled from sleep, but his blue eyes staring out the frosted window.

Then he remembered the events of last night, that stranger that lay in his arms, wounded so badly.

James rubbed his eyes then wearily stood up, stumbling in his sleepiness until he fell onto his best friend's bed, creating a dip.

"You're thinking about him aren't you?" James asked softly from where he was lying down beside Sirius. His friend nodded and turned towards him. James shifted until he was sitting up two; he brushed his messy hair back and blinked wearily, still thinking of that youthful face, almost like his own and those eyes. So bright emerald green, yet so dull, and agonised at the same time.

Then James blinked and sat up straight; he had an idea. He turned to look at the clock which read five thirty in the morning. He whirled around the dormitory not caring whether he might be waking up his other friends.

Sirius watched him then said softly, "I don't think so Prongs, I mean we don't even know who he is!"

James finally found what he was looking for in the bottom of his trunk and turned back to Sirius, the object in his hands, "I just want to see if he's alright Padfoot!"

Sirius sighed and joined James as his friend hurried down the stairs; together they hauled the cloak on over their heads and exited the portrait silently. James walked defiantly ahead and Sirius watched his friend carefully under the cloak.

He'd never seen his friend have such strong feelings about anything remotely like this.

Finally some silence they came to he closed doors of the infirmary. The cream, solid wood doors seemed barred like, holding the stranger within, protectively like a mother hen.

James and Sirius pushed on it attentively and peered inside.

On the far bed, by the window, white crisp sheets were covering the body of a slightly breathing teen. His unruly ebony hair peeking out over the pillow, his eyes closed from the looks of it.

James stared for a moment before opening the door wider and slipping inside, Sirius could do nothing more then follow.

The pair silently crept across the cold, tiled linen floor until they were suddenly beside the bed. James casually put his hands on the sheets; for some reason he felt drawn to this teen who mysteriously found his way to them.

Whoever this stranger was, James felt very protective of him; something he could not explain.

The duo looked upon the half obscured face of the person as he slept peacefully, though his wounds still apparent upon his delicate pale skin. It was obvious that some bruises could not be healed and disappear with just a flick of a wand.

The stranger had his arm in a sling and Sirius also glimpsed white bandages under the white hospital garb.

The mysterious teen looked indefinitely vulnerable and it made James heart clench. He had been caged in if you will, he knew of the Dark wizard who terrorized people. For some reason he could see it was evident that this boy in front of them had somehow came in contact with him.

For some reason, it distressed him deeply.

He was awoken from his musings when he saw a flicker of brilliant green in the corner of his eyes. Sirius noted it too and unconsciously took a step backwards.

James watched intently as the boy's eyes became glazed again, attempting to focus; then he remembered, he'd left the boy's glasses in his robe from last night. He would have to retrieve them later; perhaps it was better if the stranger could not see clearly.

The silence was broken when the weary eyes attempted to focus on James; ignoring the other faces peering at him.

"Who are you? Who am I?"

**--------------------------------------------**

Severus Snape had not slept a wink that night, it was now around a quarter to six and he knew he wouldn't get any now. So he hasted to change into his uniform then exited the Slytherin Common room, not knowing that Lucius Malfoy was following him.

He remembered what had happened last night and was immediately curious to the stranger's whereabouts and strangely enough their wellbeing. He hastened up the floors until he came to infirmary doors which were open a crack.

He peeked in, a curtain of his lank hair falling lazily over his obsidian eyes; but not enough to obscure his view. He scowled when he saw that the two Gryffindors had beaten him to the mysterious stranger. Potter was bent over, staring at the boy, his hand casually lying beside the stranger's own.

Funnily enough Black was sitting on his backside on the ground. Snape eased his body through the crack slightly and watched from afar.

He heard slowly uttered words, in a child like voice but still close to man-hood, "_Who are you? Who am I?_"

Then what surprised him was the emotion that played on both James Potter's and the mysterious teens face. It seemed a revelation had just slammed into the stranger, but James seemed shocked at the question.

"I am James Potter, I found you," Was all he uttered softly, then the stranger closed his eyes.

Black had finally managed to pick himself off the ground and he moved closer. The stranger looked past James for a moment, in a reverie, and then promptly burst into tears.

Snape, startled back up against the door whilst James and Sirius did the same near the bed.

This was a foreign scene for them all, to see an adolescent boy, much like themselves torn into such distress. James immediately snapped out of staring before moving closer and in an instinctive move, clasping the boy's hand gently.

"Its alright, you're at Hogwarts. You're safe,"

The stranger promptly stopped, but silent tears managed to make silver paths down his gaunt cheeks. He stared as the other hand that held his own, and managed a shy smile at James, saying softly,

"I remember now. My name is Julian Knight, please keep me safe."

**--------------------------------------------**

Harry remembered faint words, distant upon the battle ground, only just reaching his ears_, "Be in peace Mr Potter, I still remember you. You were and are my friend. Goodbye."_

He knew in his gut, Snape had saved him. He ought to thank the man, even though he remembered that in the future Snape would be dead.

He passively fingered the golden chain around his neck as another tear followed the first. He swallowed the lump in his throat and managed softly in his own mind, "Thankyou Professor Snape."

Then he looked back up to the sixteen year old teenagers in front of him, he was safe. Safe with his dad even if James didn't even know it.

"_I remember now. My name is Julian Knight, please keep me safe."_

As soon as Snape heard this he closed his eyes then quietly exited back through the infirmary doors. Just because he had seen this "Julian Knight" guy the night before, didn't mean he should be entitled to care.

But he felt a waning tug that made him want to talk to this stranger who had miraculously, and unconsciously, stepped into Severus Snape's life, forever.

Lucius Malfoy peered in the door as Snape left, his eyes narrowed. Who was this stranger to get the likes of Severus Snape riled enough in concern to see them?

**--------------------------------------------**

**To be continued…**

Well, there you go. Harry's alias in the past is Julian Knight, (I know I changed the name, but I hate that guy now lol). Ironic, his surname, I used it because Harry is sort of like a knight…..

I hope you've enjoyed the 2nd instalment of "Stand Afar or Take a Chance"

**By the way, to any readers of "Unbreakable Ties" I'm incredibly sorry for not updating! ****I will not be abandoning that story, I promise!**

Please review (yes the little button down in the left hand corner, press "Go")

Thanks, till next time (Hopefully soon)

~Yun


	3. Part 2 Section I: Disarmed you

AN/: Usual disclaimed and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all. I also changed Lucius Malfoy's age, hope you don't mind! NOT SLASH. Harry Potter is now formally known as Julian Knight from now onwards.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part two, Section I**

Disarmed you

Disarm you with a smile,  
And cut you like you want me to,  
Cut that little child,  
Inside of me and such a part of you,  
Oh, the years burn-Disarm, Smashing Pumpkins.

_The stranger promptly stopped, but silent tears managed to make silver paths down his gaunt cheeks. He stared as the other hand that held his own, and managed a shy smile at James, saying softly,_

"_I remember now. My name is Julian Knight, please keep me safe."_

**--------------------------------------------**

_June 1976_

James sat quietly at the Gryffindor table under the great hall's ceiling. Eating slowly, gnawing at his chicken leg, vaguely uninterested in his surroundings. He was only absorbed in the thoughts swirling around his head about Julian Knight, the still mysterious stranger.

He remembered he had felt a strange bond and wasn't sure what it was but he still clung onto it. He felt an understanding between the two of the, a similar channel perhaps or rather a invisible friendship; unknown to both of them

He rubbed his forehead cautiously and ran a nervous hand through his brown hair and squinted through his circular glasses.

He couldn't seem to eat at that possible moment. His friends were staring worried and so were some of the teachers. No one had actually seen James potter so consumed in thought even when he was in the midst of eating.

Lily Evans, the soon to be head girl had her jaw dropped but shut it back with a sense of propriety. It was a novelty to see the boy of her affections so…strange.

Her best friends giggled and pointed but she merely frowned and could not stare away. Remus was shaking his head thoughtfully while Peter was sort of gob smacked and Sirius trying to poke his best friend out of his reverie.

Dumbledore merely had a twinkle in his eye as he stared on over his large goblet of drink. Minerva McGonagall was just as gob smacked as the majority of the staff but tried to look discreet by looking away.

Finally everyone got over that fact that James potter had a concerned, no worried look of thought plastered to his handsomely young face.

Then breakfast was over and another strange thing happened.

James Potter dropped what he was eating and in the process nearly knocking over his drink and emptying the entire table on his housemates. Got up and ran hell over water out of the hall and shut the doors with loud boom.

Silence ensured after that, everyone's jaws dropped.

Sirius, Remus and Peter were not long after and that was even stranger.

Not that everyone knew but they were immediately running after their friend as he cursed his way up the endless corridors towards the only place of meaning towards him. They soon found themselves breathless as they stopped right in front of the double doors of the white washed infirmary for the sick and injured.

They all it was on their minds exactly where their friend had gone and why. But another part of that question in the back of their minds was still mystified as the stranger who had appeared apparently out of no where.

No longer were they curious as they sighed, James was bending over the sleeping form as his heavy eyelids were drawn closed into a peaceful sleep.

His raven locks in contrast with the white, plastic like sheets, the sunlight just filtering through the little glass window besides the bed. It shined on the sheets and made them sparkle but made the occupant look some what vulnerable.

The stood afar by the door and watched as their friend's lips moved slightly talking very quietly almost silently to the patient who could not even hear his new found friend.

They grimaced as they found themselves wishing that their friend had not gotten so protective and duty given of what seemed to be his new charge. They found that this mysterious stranger could be dangerous to the likes of James.

Though none of them had seen him so caring, so trustworthy, and so empathetic. It quite literally shocked them and they knew that Lily Evans would be quiet shocked to see this….sensitive side of her future boyfriend (well that's how James saw it as when he joked with his friends) little did she know that this very person was what the future held.

Though none of them did know except for another certain blonde haired slytherin that not only James seemed to be inclined to visit the stranger, so did a certain slytherin who had been intrigued enough to want to help.

They decided to move onwards and could now slightly hear what James was saying to his now what he called 'charge' but would soon become his friend…

Sirius screwed his eyes and Remus smiled, though peter was quite unsure what he was meant to do. Suddenly as they could only just hear what James was saying, the stranger's heavy eyelids opened slowly and his head swivelled to take in his surrounding.

A glazed look of confusion plastered his eyes until they renewed recognition and remembrance. James frowned as he sensed some recognition at the colour of his new charges eyes…they were just like Lily Evan's…

He soon wiped the frown and tempted to put a serene but kind face on.

"How are you?"

Julian Knight carefully ran a still trembling, fragile hand through his ebony mess of hair and nodded slowly, the sunlight showing just how gaunt and pale the resident teen was. James winced as Julian winced, coughing violently before attempting a weak smile.

James was still very curious into how Julian had been injured or where he was from, there many possibilities, the last just as quirking as the first, and the thought…that he had Lily Evan's eyes. Not just similar, but exactly like hers; in a sense like this Julian Knight had stolen them…

James threw away the thought and moved a chair to sit down on beside the bed.

If he wanted information he couldn't push it. By the emotion from last nights encounter he didn't know exactly how much trauma this teen had been through; he had no wish to distress him any further.

He smiled in a friendly fashion at Julian and tried to break the ice as easily as he could.

"So Julian, do you remember anything that happened last night? You were in pretty bad shape and all…." James trailed off, not sure how to end the sentence without bringing it to close to home for Julian.

He noted that his friends stood by the door and motioned them to stay there for the moment.

Julian froze, and if possible paled even further. James took this as a bad sign and threw his hands up as a peace gesture.

"Listen Julian, don't worry. I don't need to know….it's okay….I'm sorry for-"

But Julian cut him off quickly and abruptly, saying softly, fiddling with his hands before looking up defiantly into James's hazel orbs, "No James, it's alright."

The silence was deafening and the pale Julian turned to the other three standing by the door and nodded for them to come forwards.

Remus paused with Sirius, and Peter stood nervously unsure what to do. Julian nodded again, a serious glint showing in the emerald depths of his eyes. They moved closer carefully, not wanting to crowd him.

Julian smiled at them. They didn't know if they should smile back. With a nod, they did.

He stared at each one of them carefully, nearly examining their faces. At Sirius and Remus he had a faint smile upon his lips, but when he came to Peter he looked away quickly.

Sirius stifled a giggle at this thinking that stranger thought that their resident friend peter was too weird to even be looked at. But Remus took this one a serious note that this stranger immediately took a disliking to their friend.

James merely shrugged and strongly curious in what Julian had to say. He shushed Remus's opened mouth and turned intently to Julian. Silence echoing around the group, the solid walls of the infirmary keeping them in and keeping unknown people out.

Finally Julian stared away and broke the silence, unsure of how to start but defiant of how he wanted his story told truth or not.

"I-I-" He somewhat managed to stammer through the actual start of his sentence he was so sure on some parts on what he was going to tell them, but others scared to death of their judgements and thoughts.

He continued, this time more defiant than before, "I was taken hostage…hostage by a-"He shuddered in effect, this was both fiction and the truth.

"-By a horrible man……he was vile and disgusting….he tortured me endlessly that night-" Julian paused again, he remembered the faces of the terrifying dead who had been tortured endlessly to an unmerciful death upon their heads. But that just made him want this story told further even if it wasn't the complete and entirely straight truth.

Julian looked down towards his hands, not sure whether he should entail so much horror that he had faced in his teenage past life.

"-Usually it was just beating every now and then, punishments….but that night he….he was drunk and-" Julian knew that this was a fabled story but the memories seemed to be flooding back to him and he was unsure what reaction would be deemed too fictitious to them.

He needed to gain their trust, Snape had saved him and he did not want to ruin his now new life in the past with the two people in the world who would have loved him the most had they not died, or nor if he hadn't been saved.

Snape had obviously thrown away his ebbing hatred for the men of the past and present to leave Harry in their care. He had trusted them with his own judgement to take care of his charge in the future. He had obviously had an inkling of his own younger self; in those last few moments in the future, he had been defiant about his choice.

Julian sighed, rubbing a rough hand over his bruises face and staring away. Every time he wished to speak of his some what fabled story, the truth that was buried underneath became uncovered.

He knew that everyone he loved in the future was dead, whether he liked it or not. He could do nothing to change it; if he lived out his life in the past then he would be a different man in the future.

"I'll start from the beginning…" Julian managed to say through his constricted throat, swallowing past the large lump that obstructed it.

The group nodded at him seriously, James sending a concerned look his way.

"When I was a baby my parents were murdered by a dark wizard, I went to live with my relatives who were muggles," Julian paused, daring to look up at James to see if he had any reaction.

James was looking at him, eyebrows furrowed in worry as he listened on. He caught Julian's eye with a reassuring look, nodding for him to continue.

"One day, I was playing out the front after I had just turned eleven. This wizard walked past and before I knew it, he grabbed me and apparated. My life's been a blur since then….."

"I remember last night though…..Tom, the wizard who took me, was drunk as hell. He cast so many curses on me and I don't remember much after that, but he went flying back into the wall and then I woke up here."

Julian looked down, he used Voldemort's name knowing that they would never figure it out. He just hoped that they believed his story and didn't scrutinise him. He realized this was his last chance at a happy life and a happy future; he wasn't going to blow it.

Julian looked up at them through his fringe. He noted they all wore looked of shock, horror and sympathy. James even moved closer and put a comforting hand on top of the bed spread near Julian's.

Sirius was bewildered and he moved closer, his head bowed. Remus stood afar, shock plastered on his young face as he clutched a hand unconsciously to his chest.

Peter merely stood where he had been, a neutral expression upon his face, eyes averted. He seemed to not care at all but attempted to look concerned a tiny bit.

The silence was deafening and no one had the heart to say anything, not even James.

The Marauders could not even imagine what six years with a maniac could do to a child, regularly beaten and nearly cursed to oblivion in a drunken rampage. Inside they were seething, of course save Peter. But they had no better words to say to Julian, fearing the reaction.

Julian managed a grim smile then tried to say brightly, "So who would these guys be James?" in a timid voice, Julian thanked that his voice didn't crack as he said his future father's name.

He turned to the rest of the marauders and smiled at them with closed lips; they all smiled back. Julian had never felt so welcomed before and he felt a warm contentment in his heart; oh…to see Sirius again! His father and his mother! He could not wait to get a glimpse of her!

James smiled and answered bright, "Well this here-"He gestured to the rogue hair and head of Sirius, followed along by his lean, body, "-is Sirius Black, one of my best mates in whole wide world-"He moved along the line, messing up Remus's neat hair, making Remus swat him away, "-Is Remus Lupin, one of my other best mates in the whole wide world-"

He stopped in front of Peter only to push Peter who ended up falling over Sirius who had mischievously managed to crawl and crouch behind him. As Peter sat sprawled on his backside he rubbed his back, he said in a whiny voice, "Awww James, Sirius, couldn't you just have introduced me like Remus?"

This just made the group laugh and strangely enough Julian laughed the hardest at this. He now truly hated Peter for he knew what would happen in the future and never would trust the man even if right now he was a teenager just like himself.

Julian continued laughing until the others stopped, when he finally did he found himself faced with a few weird looks and an amused one from James.

Sirius, albeit looked quite pleased with himself. Peter on the other hand, not liking being the butt of the joke scowled at Julian. Julian just widely smiled back, trying to stop the mirth from arising in his chest again.

James still had the amused look frozen on his face, his lips quirked and brown eyebrows raised. Julian blushed at them and managed to hold down his laughter, "Sorry." He mumbled and looked away. He couldn't believe he'd just done that in front of them all; how embarrassing. They'd probably be thinking what a prat he was.

James, Sirius and Remus merely looked at each other and chuckled, Remus for the first time speaking, "It's alright Julian, we'd like to think we're that funny sometimes,"

This just made Julian smile even wider, if possible. He loved seeing his father, his godfather and future teacher and guardian of a sort being so carefree.

James helped Peter up and seated himself at the end of Julian's bed, Sirius joined him while Remus sat on the vacant chair and strangely enough Peter decided to return to the floor.

"So man, we'll have to take you on an exclusive trip around Hogwarts hey? I mean you do know what Hogwarts is, don't you?" James asked brightly, tweaking the sheets underneath Julian's feat.

Julian felt like a deer in the headlights and shrugged, "Is it like a school or something?"

They four of them nodded and grinned before they launched into a great commentary on Hogwarts. Julian sighed happily in his head and listened intently to the Marauder's summary of his home sweet home.

**--------------------------------------------**

Julian stayed in the hospital wing secretly for a few more days, the Marauders taking every chance they could to visit him. Julian was delighted inside though he was aching to see Hogwarts again.

He longed to see the visage of his mother somewhere, deep in the back of his mind, Julian dearly wanted to find Snape and somehow….he didn't know…talk to him or something.

He could never forget that man, in the past, present or future. He owed him.

Finally one morning when the sun was shining brightly through the small window by his bed side, Julian looked up to see Dumbledore watching him, smiling, and a twinkle in his eyes.

Julian couldn't help but smile back. He was overly happy inside to see his Headmaster of past and future. This man had made many mistakes at Julian's expense in the future but Julian knew he was only trying to protect him.

"Ah Mr Knight, it is good to see you are well, the night you were found you were in terrible shape. I hope you don't mind if I ask a few question? I hear madam Pomfrey is releasing you today,"

Julian brightened to hear the last bit of news and nodded, he knew that Dumbledore would never intend to hurt him. He also knew that the Headmaster needed to know this if Julian was to attend Hogwarts.

So, Julian again told his fabled tale of his tragic little life, bits of truth thrown in here and there. He told it with acute accuracy, not wishing to ruin anything he had made; he intended to live his life out here.

It was one and only, second chance.

"I gather from what you have told me, that you wouldn't remember your relatives?" The headmaster cast a concerned look upon the teen, his composure serious and warming at the same time.

Julian looked away. He had never remembered much of the Dursley's once the war had begun. Yes they had been horrible to him and he had wished to forget them forever. But now as hard as he thought, he could not even remember a minute detail about them.

"No sir, I don't.'

Dumbledore nodded carefully and began again, "I assume you have no where else to go?" Another "No Sir." as Julian played with his hands, looking out the window.

Even in the past he had no where to go.

The Headmaster sighed sympathetically and assured the young man, "I will find someplace for you Julian, do not doubt me on that matter. You will have a home for the holidays and when you come back, you will be sorted."

"I am pleased to hear that your finders have been very studious towards you. James and Sirius, as well as their little gang have visited you everyday I hear?" The still aged wizard, though in the past inquired kindly, his eyes twinkling in a friendly fashion.

Julian smiled at the memories of the past few days that he had spent with the Marauders, "Yes sir, they have been very kind towards me. I am grateful for everyday they visit me,"

Dumbledore smiled, "Then I hope you will be sorted in Gryffindor next term, for I see true friendships and bravery in you young Mr Knight,"

Julian grinned and nodded, "I hope so too, Sir."

The elder man nodded before courteously bowing his head, "I shall see you at the feast then Mr Knight. I am sure Madam Pomfrey shall get you settled into robes for the meantime. And just remember; do not be nervous at the feast."

**--------------------------------------------**

Julian stood nervously outside the infirmary doors, feeling quite vulnerable. His mind seemed in shambles because of his obvious future life. He wore loose robes that hung off hi skinny frame, due to the war his body had been strong for awhile but after the collapse of defeating the Dark Lord, his body had broken.

He fingered his ribs that he could feel through the robes and ran a trembling hand through his hair. He stumbled slightly as he felt light headed, he also was in need of his glasses; he had no idea where they were.

He braced himself against the wall, obviously he was still weak. He had no idea how much energy time travel took out of an adolescent body.

But then again…the torture had only happened less than a month ago. The most recent before Snape had saved him.

He had been with them for three months. It still hurt him deeply inside, he had escaped yes, but the pain lingered ever so long.

The pain of Ron's death even bewildered Julian, even more so than the torture. Suddenly he found himself sliding down a wall, no tears in his eyes, his mouth open in silent pain, gasping for breath that he found hard to come by.

His eyes glazed of unawareness without his glasses; he buried his head in his hands and knees. He had never felt so much despair in his life as he sat against a wall in silent grief in the past.

Then he felt a warm hand on his shoulder and heard to voices, though he still did not look up because to him he heard Ron and Hermione's voices; he blocked them out. Well, tried to.

"Jesus James, what are we going to do?" Clearly Sirius's voice.

Another muffled one, "I don't know on Julian, it's alright….I-"James obviously didn't know what to say as he comforted the other teen.

Julian looked up, his emerald eyes full of sadness they couldn't clearly decipher.

"You alright mate?" James asked timidly, inclining his head at Julian.

Julian closed his eyes for a moment and nodded, standing up shakily as the other two boys helped him. He then said thanks quietly and walked on down some corridor. They followed, leading him to where he needed to be.

They didn't ask questions, and he didn't want them to.

**--------------------------------------------**

The next few hours past for a blur as Julian's mind seemed evidently consumed in the future events that had so horribly scarred him. He wasn't surprised when James volunteered to take Julian home for the summer holidays.

He took note of that and managed a weak smile of thanks to his new friend, James and Sirius grinned back. That was when Julian remembered that Sirius most probably lived with the Potter's.

This brightened him up a little and pulled him out of his depression a smidge.

Only on the way home to James's house when Julian was pretending to be asleep, did he hear their true judgement of himself from the marauders...

"Prongs, this kid-"

"Padfoot, he's could possibly even be older than you, just because your turning seventeen in a few days-"

"Exactly, I mean his birthday couldn't be before mine-"

"How on earth do you get that assumption?" Remus's voice was heard clearly as his book was put down with a thud.

"Well, I mean he's scrawny, small, looked like a kid-"

"Padfoot, if you were tortured within inches of your life the night before, you would probably look like that too,"

"Oh shut up Moony. You know what I mean, yes I feel sorry for the kid, and I do. But we can't trust him,"

"Padfoot, he needs people to trust, not the other way around. He was abducted when he was eleven! He spent six years with that man!" Julian heard James exclaim loudly, but was shushed by Remus.

"James, he's asleep and he clearly needs it. Don't wake him,"

Julian heard James sigh, he dared not look up.

"I don't know what it is, but I feel I have to take care of him-"

"You being motherly Prongs? What's the world coming to?" Another voice squeaked on the edge of hysteric.

"Shut up Peter!" James growled softly.

There was silence until James finally continued, "Just imagine, I'm surprised he's as alright as he is. Sirius, do you remember the condition he was in when we found him?"

Silence, then, a quiet, "Yeah Prongs, I do. It was awful."

More silence then another whisper, "I can't believe Snivellous was actually civil to you that night Prongs,"

A pause. Julian nearly gasped. Snape had been there that night? The young Snape had seen him?!

"Yeah he was. But I'm never speaking to that greasy git again. If he comes a foot near Julian-!" James was shushed again by Remus as his voice had grown steadily louder. Julian was surprised by the protectiveness in James's voice. He smiled before slipping back to sleep.

"So Prongs, any home welcoming pranks in store for our new friend?"…

**--------------------------------------------**

**To be continued…**

Hope you've enjoyed the third instalment on "Stand afar or take a chance". I promise that next chapter we'll see some pranks and after the holiday chapters there'll be more Snape, Malfoy and we'll meet Lily!

What do you think? I ask you to please take the time to review!

So, please review (yes the little button down in the left hand corner, press "Go")

Thanks, till next time. Hopefully next week.

Yun


	4. Part 2 Section II:Part of me,Part of you

AN/: Usual disclaimer and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all. I also changed Lucius Malfoy's age, hope you don't mind! NOT SLASH.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part two, Section II**

Part of me, Part of you

I used to be a little boy.  
So old in my shoes.  
And what I choose is my choice,  
What's a boy supposed to do?  
The killer in me is the killer in you,  
My love.  
I send this smile over to you-Disarm, Smashing Pumpkins.

"_Padfoot, if you were tortured within inches of your life the night before, you would probably look like that too,"_

"_Oh shut up Moony. You know what I mean, yes I feel sorry for the kid, and I do. But we can't trust him,"_

**--------------------------------------------**

_June 1976_

Julian dropped his trunk at the steps of a gigantic staircase, his jaw dropped. He was broken out of his stupor as James clapped him on the back and Sirius's bark of laughter echoed the huge entry hall.

They quietened when two middle aged people came down the stairs. One was a beautiful blonde haired lady, sparkling blue eyes alight as she caught site of the boys. The other was a handsome man, almost the carbon copy of both Harry and James.

Julian looked up at his future Grandparents. They still seemed a little fuzzy, him not having his glasses because they had gone missing during his time travel; but somehow he still managed.

The lady walked over to James and pulled him into a soft, gentle hug, kissing his forehead fondly.

"Ah James, so lovely to have you home my darling boy,"

James smiled up at his mother and kissed her on the cheek, "Glad to be home Mother. I missed the manor, you and father as well."

The lady, presumably Mrs Potter smiled warmly at Sirius and hugged him gently as well; almost as if he were her own. Then she looked at Julian and her smile became wider.

She hurried down the stairs and immediately stopped in front of Julian, "Oh my! You must be Julian! What a handsome young man you are!"

Julian blushed and unconsciously looked down, meanwhile Sirius and James grinned. Mr Potter followed his wife and smiled at the two other boys before shaking Julian's hand.

"We welcome you to our home Mr Knight; you can call me Jacob and my wife Iris,"

"Then I must extend that you call me Julian, Jacob. Thankyou very much for letting me stay with your family."

The two elders nodded warmly at him and suddenly Julian found himself at peace; content. He looked back at his father and godfather who smiled at him before roughly pulling him into a group hug.

The broke apart abruptly then grabbed his robes and dragged him up the stairs. Julian grinned back at his grandparents let himself be spirited away.

He was carted down numerous hallways until he found himself suddenly stopped in front a beautiful oaken door, deep in hue and magnificently large. Julian turned back to James and Sirius, his eyes wide.

They nodded, stifling their laughter and Sirius pushed the door open for him. Julian was rocked out his shock as a ray of sunlight made a shine on his face before James clapped him on the shoulder.

The room was in darkness apart from the little sunlight but Julian could tell it was vast he could make out a huge four poster bed, an unlit fireplace and various furnishings round the room. He stepped into it, the two other teens behind him.

He was startled out of his musings as James pointed his wand at the darkened fire and burst out, "Incendio!"

The fire suddenly became ablaze and the room was bright with light. Julian got a good glimpse of everything and smiled appreciatively at the other boys.

Baby blue and royal blue furnishings and walls, a large blue bed spread and rug, arm chairs by the fire and tapestries covering the walls. He also noticed nearly hidden doors, one of either side of the room.

He looked curiously at them then to James and Sirius; they smirked and went over to each and opened them with a dramatic gesture.

"To ours rooms of course!" Sirius barked and gestured for Julian to enter his.

It was a dark green colour, but some how Sirius had managed to make it look very unslytherin. Julian smiled and nodded before leaving his room and crossing back across his own to see James.

It of course was a deep red and burgundy, just as large as his own; a fire crackling merrily.

But both of the other boys' rooms had colourful animated quidditch posters and personal items.

He looked sadly at his. All his personal items were in the future and he couldn't have been caught dead with them in the past either. All he had was a school trunk, clothes and equipment.

James noticed his looked and immediately unpeeled half of his posters from his walls with his wand and transported them to firmly stick on Julian's walls. Sirius looked sympathetic and did the same.

Soon Julian's room looked quite like their own. James emptied out his wardrobe and moved some things into their guest's room, Sirius, again followed.

Julian watched in awe, not saying anything to stop them because he knew they'd refuse. For once in his life he was seeing his father and godfather in the different light he had grown up hearing about; their kindness.

Once they were finished Julian managed a wide smile then turned around, wiping away his tears. It was all becoming quite overwhelming. They didn't see him, they just clapped him on the back then looked at each other and winked as Julian composed himself.

When he turned around he found them each grasping a broom, James had two. He held one out to Julian, grinning.

Julian frowned a little and accepted, that was when James's grin dropped, "Have you ever flown Jules? I mean did that man ever let you out…."

Julian bit his lip, now here was a problem. He nodded casually and replied, "Yeah, he let me fly a few times. But he bounded me with invisible rope long enough to fly, but so I couldn't escape," Julian winced; he knew it sounded lame but he ran with the lie anyways.

James and Sirius looked grim but brightened as they realized the other teen was watching them.

"Then Jules! Let's go to my quidditch pitch then!"

Julian smiled behind them as they ran ahead, he loved the way his father said his new nickname. The warm smile played on his lips until they were outside, it was then that his jaw dropped.

**--------------------------------------------**

Iris and Jacob Potter drank their tea on the outside pavilion overlooking the giant quidditch pitch Jacob had transfigured for his son. They smiled as their two sons, one surrogate and one blood whiz around on their brooms, the new guest, Julian following, his laughter ringing around the vast grounds with theirs.

He had a contented grin upon his lips and twinkling in his eyes, oh how he loved to be able to fly again.

Jacob looked over at his wife, how radiant she still was and smiled; Iris smiled back, sipping her tea.

"What do you think of Julian, darling?" She asked precariously and put her cup down and shaded her face from the sun.

Jacob watched the third teen as he flew wistfully, trailing along behind James. He turned back to his wife, "I like him a lot Iris. He's perfectly mannered and Jamie seems fond of him, like he was his little brother. Have you noticed how similar Jamie and Julian are?"

Iris leaned over the railing to look closer at the whizzing figure. He was leaning low on his Stardust200, the latest range broom that James had them buy for the guest. The boy's ebony hair was unruly from the whipping wind, his beautiful green eyes squinting and his lithe limbs hugging the broom.

She nodded and continued watching her own son and their guest. Their were some subtle similarities, such as the fact James had a handsome, boyish, exuberant looks, but Julian's expression made him look weary, older.

They both frowned, they had heard the whole story from Headmaster Dumbledore, and it seemed they had a weakness for stray puppies.

They would heal this boy; he would become whole and innocent again.

Julian was close to giggling as he hovered in mid air, watching Sirius chase James around the pitch. But they were both steadily getting dizzy as James's tactic was to fly rings around the pitch. Julian could just see the blurs flying around and sat back, unconsciously smiling, in a daze of happiness.

He was so unconsciously glad that he did not notice the blurs flying right at him, _Padfoot wouldn't dare follow me, he'd run into Jules. Jules will move of course._

He didn't hear Iris and Jacob's screams from far away, "Julian get out of the way!"

Julian snapped his attention over to the blur coming steadily closer, he attempted to focus but was thrown abruptly of course when the blur slammed into him and he slipped off his broom…

He felt himself falling, wind howling in his ears, blood rushing loudly, and then with a thud, he hit the ground; dazed. He attempted to lift his head up to look around, but it felt like lead and it was as if his mind was swimming in a black ocean.

He was slightly aware of voices, loud, tormenting around him; he wished they would shut up.

He felt something wet seeping through his lips and he badly wanted to brush it away; but again his body felt like lead.

He felt the liquid seep past his lips and drip down his face and under his chin; he almost desperately wished it away. Now it seemed that the world was tilting and it felt suddenly familiar. He became aware of fuzzy images and figures over him and his mind began to shake erratically. That was then his eyelids drooped shut.

**--------------------------------------------**

_Harry felt his head smash on the cement floor as the Deatheaters released him and he hissed as the pain reverberated through his skull. Mingled laughter echoed around him and he attempted to lift his head, but it felt so heavy…_

_He gasped in pain as someone sent a stinging hex and it hit him directly in the right ribcage. More chuckling and the circle were closing in; suddenly Harry felt claustrophobic._

_Suddenly pain lanced in his left cheekbone as someone sent a cutting hex; he felt the warm liquid seeping through the gash and onto his lips and dribbling down his chin._

_He lifted a hand, wanting to wipe it away, but his limbs felt so heavy and he merely rolled his head away to the other side._

_Without his glasses the Deatheaters merely looked like black blurs, metallic masks on their faces; peering, staring, taunting._

_The next couple of moments were oblivion, countless hexes and curses were used, in the end tears were mingling with the both dried and wet blood marring his skin. They laughed at his tears and Lucius Malfoy even dared to lift one off delicately with his finger._

_To Harry's half unconscious shock, he sucked it off, "The taste of innocence. So sweet,"_

_Then, Harry turned to his side and violently threw up the blood pooling in his stomach. After he had finished there was silence, that was when his scar burst into fire and he screamed._

"He told me he knew how to fly! The bloody idiot! He wouldn't move! It's like he couldn't see me!" James's bellowing voice stirred Julian and he opened his eyes slowly.

Once Julian had fully opened his eyes he found himself in his large bed, buried under his deep blue covers. He wasn't wearing anything but his borrowed boxers and he had a white bandage wrapped around his entire torso and he felt a large lump of bandage on the back of his head, his right arm was also in a sling.

He noticed the still blurry figures of James and what looked like his father, Jacob. He could also see Sirius leaning against the door frame, his arms folded grimly. It reminded Julian of a time he got into trouble for sliding down the banister in Grimmauld place in his fifth year.

He almost smiled, that was until the pain slammed into him and he groaned, leaning back against the headboard.

This made everyone in the room turn to look at him, James was first. He strode over to the bed, clearly furious and immediately grabbed Julian roughly by his upper arm.

"What the hell is wrong with you Jules?!" He nearly screamed in the younger boy's face; Julian flinched. He was aware that James had maintained to use his nickname but that didn't cushion the hurt of the accusation from his father's voice.

Before he could even open his mouth to reply, James was pulled away gently by his father. Julian looked away; his feelings and emotions were mixed.

When he looked back up, Jacob's still youthful face was exasperated as he watched his son storm out of the room. He then turned back to Julian, his face sympathetic.

"I apologise Julian, it's just James was overly worried about you. So much that I fear my son is angry with you, just take it as concern. Now, are you alright?"

Julian swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat and nodded, looking away out the window. He had noticed that Sirius had followed his friend as he had charged out. Even with Jacob's presence, Julian felt alone.

Jacob nodded with a clearing of his throat; he respected Julian's silence before leaving silently and quietly closing the bedroom door with a click. Julian then lent back further in to his covers an analysed the situation that had happened.

It was clearly obvious that he was lacking proper vision without his glasses, but he had no hope in hell of ever finding them. If he did, perchance they would be damaged beyond repair.

Plus he knew, the minute he put glasses on, they would realize the similarities. Now he couldn't do that; the laws of time travelling permitted that he not be recognised by anyone.

He slumped back; he was royally fucked no which way he went. His exhaustion, which thoroughly surprised him in the little time that he had been awake, suddenly overcame him.

He fell back into the lull of sleep, though this time, dark thoughts and memories raiding his mind.

Julian awoke to a shuffling noise around his bed canopy; he opened his eyes slowly and tried to lift his head. He noticed a fuzzy figure shuffling closer to his bed, he noticed blearily, white knuckles clutching his sheets, near his own, motionless hand.

Then, the whispered words that made Julian freeze, "Jules, you awake? I-I need to talk to you,"

It was James. James's lenses glinting in the moonlight, highlighting his hazel eyes; tousled hair silhouetted against the stark light.

Julian nodded dimly, knowing that the older teen would pick up on his minute movements.

The bed dipped with the teen's weight as he sat down, Julian managed to fully open his eyes. As he did he noticed James fumbling with something from his pocket, and before he knew what was happened the other boy had slipped something onto his face.

The suddenly two things happened; everything got clearer and James gasped loudly.

Julian; in essence, Harry stared and James stared back, his mouth agape and his hazel eyes drinking in the completed features of the boy lying there.

James noticed the curves of the boy's cheekbones; so much like Lily Evan's when she had a nonchalant look on her face as she read a book. Also, her eyes so calculating and in depth…just like Julian's.

His thin lips, the bottom poutier than the top, much like his own. And his ebony hair, so much like the messy raven's nests his usually was.

The way the circular rimmed glass framed Julian's eyes and thick lashes. He looked….he looked exactly like himself with subtle difference and such familiarity to Lily Evans.

"Merlin! You…you…you aren't me are you?" James gasped, turning on the bedside light to illuminate the room more. Julian looked over at his side at something then turned back sharply, "No, I'm not. But I'm your son,"

Silence again before James could stop Julian; he had a wand pointing in his face.

James's eyes widened and he had a split second to look at his future son before the glasses were ripped off and Julian had whispered the incantation, "Obliviate!"

Julian took a second to transfigure his glasses into contact lenses; the perfect prescription and put them onto his eyes. In this moment James managed to gather his bearing finally as Julian feigned sleep.

"Jules, you awake? I-I need to talk to you,"

Julian opened his eyes with deliberate slowness, "Y-Yeah James?"

James's expression softened and he let out a deep sigh, "I just want to apologise for my behaviour before. It was unacceptable, I take all responsibility for the accident," He ended it with a small smile, Julian smiled back and nodded.

His secret was safe; for now.

**--------------------------------------------**

_He opened his eyes. He closed them. He opened them again. They closed again on their own accord._

_After numerous tries Harry found himself unwillingly staring at the scene around him. Despite the throbbing he felt in various parts of his body, he felt no pain. But the blood he swam in showed different._

_He could tell it was his own blood, draining out of deep gashes and cuts all over his body, damn Lucius and his lovely silver knives._

_He felt the sticky residue of the clots dripping off his cheekbone and split lip. He rolled his eyes, imagine if Severus saw him in this predicament; man would probably throw up._

_His musings however were interrupted when the door was opened so abruptly that it sent a shiver down Harry's spine; dear Merlin he hoped that Lucius wasn't back to play…_

_It wasn't; he recognised Severus's combat boots anywhere. He let out a sigh, wincing at the feel of his cheek against the cold, sticky stones._

_  
Sev-Severus, such a pleasure for you to show up," he managed sarcastically, little did he know that not one, but two people had entered the room._

"_My my Severus, first name basis now? You must have him completely wrapped around your fingers!" Damn. It was Lucius, again._

_Harry harshly chuckled but spat out blood as the blonde aristocrat kicked him, hard in the rubs._

_He knew that ever if his mentor was here, no way would he be able to bail him out. He held back a choked sob at his predicament that came out more as a chuckle._

_This soon came out as full blown laughter, harsh and rough from screaming too much; even if he had stayed silent until Lucius started using the pain potion slathered knife._

_His laughter was interrupted when a knife was rammed in between his ribs, this time, he screamed._

_The next few moments was a flurry of sounds, suddenly he felt the knife become dislodged and ripped out of his tender skin, a yelled "Stupefy!", a thump on the ground and harsh panting._

_Then someone, pale skinned, hair hanging down knelt down beside him, gently checking his vitals, concern marring his face._

"_Severus." Harry managed to breathe this out before he felt his consciousness vanish and someone picked him up gently._

"_I'm here Harry."_

**--------------------------------------------**

TBC…

**Just want to say ****thankyou**** to the people who have reviewed so far. Means quite a lot to me, I assure you.**

Love it? Hate it?

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Thanks, till next time. Hopefully in next few weeks.

Yun

P.S: UT readers, update shall be coming soon :)


	5. Part 3 Section I:Carefree & Alive

AN/: Usual disclaimer and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all. I also changed Lucius Malfoy's age, hope you don't mind! NOT SLASH.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part three, Section I**

Carefree & Alive

On cold frosty Martian mornings,  
The chill on my breath is red,   
Redder than my mother's blood.  
When she turned to me and said,  
"This is not how we planned it,  
But we've gotten ahead of ourselves."-Citizens of Tomorrow, Tokyo Police Club.

_Silence again before James could stop Julian; he had a wand pointing in his face._

_James's eyes had widened and he had a split second to look at his future son before the glasses were ripped off and Julian had whispered the incantation, "Obliviate!"_

**--------------------------------------------**

_April 1997_

_Screaming. Not to mention how hoarse his voice was, throat burning, tingles up and down his spine. Fingernails grappled on the crevasses in the tiles, blood and skin the only thing holding them there._

_Sweat, single droplets running down his temples. His once brilliant eyes now dull, almost lifeless; though bloodshot, almost maniac._

_To the eye he looked nothing like the defiant teenager he is; more like a vulnerable child. A child that should be wrapped in the arms of its mother, comforted and protected by its father._

_But no; this child lay alone, gasping for breath, screaming on the inside, wanting, needing; pained._

_The darkness that envelops him, he is so used to it. But he hates it. He would kill for sunlight even if he knows it will burn his eyes but warm his cold, cold skin._

_Every now and then as he lay upon the stone floor of the meeting room, he would recognise the deep, silken voice of a familiar ally._

_He attempted to keep his pride intact, and what little dignity he had left he tried to keep. He would not let Snape see him so weak, he would not._

_He knew the older man who hid behind his own mask, dignity upheld would enjoy the continuous torture of his sixteen year old self._

_Little did he know that these sentiments were never true._

**--------------------------------------------**

_June 1976_

The morning light settled on the lilac sheets of Julian's bed and he sat up wearily. He closed his eyes tightly as tears threatened to seep through them as he remembered his nightmares, hours previous.

He hugged his knees together and suddenly gasped; an empty loneliness filling his heart as he remembered who he was now.

It had been so terribly long since he had actually remembered the full details of his dream and having no one there to comfort him. He choked back a sob as he remembered every night in the dorms and tents; where ever they were in the world, Ron would be there to help him through them.

But no; he wasn't and couldn't be there. Julian was alone.

He was shaking, shaking so bad that his lips trembled and his eyes were watering like a rain shower. His breaths came in hacking breaths, his emotions over riding him fully, nothing being able to stop them in their pace.

Finally after what seemed hours, but in reality minutes he stopped and composed himself right before James came sneaking through his side door.

He saw that Harry was awake and put a finger to his lips and nodded at Sirius's door on the other side. Julian nodded and still shaking from his ordeal that morning but managed to grin.

He watched as James pulled out a bucket through the door; from what Julian could see it was brimming with….slime!?

He snickered and pushed himself out of bed, he supposed this was Sirius's morning wake up. He couldn't wait to see his future Godfather's face; no way was he going to miss out on this!

He pulled back the sheets and scrambled out of bed in just his boxers, following James quietly.

They crossed the floors and tried to open the door knob to Sirius's room carefully, James motioned that it tended to squeak. He also said something about Sirius purposely putting a noise spell on it.

But James was confident that he dispelled it. He was right, because when they opened the door finally it made absolutely no noise. But Julian had a feeling that something wasn't right.

So they crept across the green carpet as stealthily as they could manage before they loomed over Sirius who was peacefully sleeping; splayed out in his dark green sheets, hair bedraggled.

As they loomed over him, they each to a hand onto the bucket and held it over his sleeping form, a grin reaching from ear to ear on both of them.

Just before they tipped it, Julian had a fleeting feeling of happiness to be in on a prank with his future father! But that smile was wiped off both their faces as with a swift flick of his wand from under the sheets, the bucket went catapulting back into their faces.

As they furiously swore and attempted to wipe the disgusting slime from their faces, Sirius was sitting on the bed; it shaking from the force of him laughing his arse off.

He grinned at James but then looked sympathetically at Julian, carefully patting him on the back but immediately regretting in when his hand came back slime covered.

"Sorry Jules, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity to be one of the first people to ever prank you in the Potter Household. And you Jamie, had that coming. You should know that I never leave my room without security from you!"

Then he began his raucously loud barking laugh as James growled. Soon he just brought out his wand and cast a fairly good scourifying charm on himself and Julian before joining in on the laughter.

Julian loved seeing the two so carefree and childish. He was soon laughing almost hysterically; he would never have had the chance of seeing a sight like this.

It wasn't long before he realized he was the only one laughing and that James and Sirius were both giving him a funny look. He stopped abruptly and there was an uncomfortable silence so Julian stared out the window quickly.

But it obviously didn't last long because when Julian looked back from the window James was giving his best friend a narrow eyed look, growling softly and menacingly, "Just so you know _Padfoot_, I _will_ get you back. No doubt about it, and after we show Julian the ropes he will too, I guarantee."

Julian smiled and didn't feel as nervous before, he still couldn't believe he'd laughed like a right prat. But he knew they'd get over it.

It was long before the three teens were sitting on Padfoot's bed reading through quidditch magazines with dressing robes thrown over their boxers.

An hour later this was how Iris Potter found them. She was very happy to see them having so much fun and it seemed like Julian fitted right in. She softly announced breakfast and it wasn't long before her own son was bounding down the hallways loudly with a hungry Sirius in tow.

She was left in the room with Julian as he got up slowly, a pained smile on his face. It confused Iris because he almost looked sad about something. But she brushed it off as she escorted him downstairs.

"So, how was Sirius's wake up call? Hectic I imagine…."

Julian's laughter echoed around the whole of Potter manor.

It was as if the two elder Potter's knew of everything that happened in their manor.

**--------------------------------------------**

At the breakfast table Jacob was calmly slicing an apple and eating it as he read the Daily Prophet. He smiled at James and ruffled his son's hair as he passed by his chair. He grinned at Sirius and clapped him on the back, "Good one Sirius, always knew you'd get the best of Jamie,"

Sirius grinned proudly while James scowled. Jacob smiled warmly at Julian as he walked past and Julian found himself smiling back un-awkwardly and suddenly carefree. He still couldn't believe he was in his father and Grandparent's home!

He soon sat down, side by side with James and Sirius; Iris in front of him conversing with her husband whilst drinking her early morning tea.

Julian smiled, this one completely reaching his emerald eyes as he helped himself to some warm toast and marmalade. By his sides James and Sirius were scoffing down bacon and eggs at an alarming rate.

Iris Potter or the resident House Elves certainly had a lot on their hands! As he munched on his toast an owl came through an open oval window behind the elder Potters and landed peacefully in front of Jacob.

Jacob sat his last piece of apple down and gently took the letter off the owl's leg. He read the name on the envelope before looking up at Julian, "It's for you son."

Julian nodded silent thanks before taking the letter in his slightly shaking hands. He didn't know why he would be getting a letter, because Julian Knight wasn't a real identity and he was sure that owl's were trained to know each wizard by their core magical signature.

He shuddered and opened the yellow envelope cautiously anyways. He was quite surprised to recognise a casual scrawl that he had been so used to seeing written on his Potions essays; which he usually failed.

The sender wrote the same 'A' that he would have when he wrote 'Abysmal' on Julian's future essays. He quickly put it back in the envelope, deciding that the breakfast table wasn't exactly the safest place to be reading a potential letter from Severus.

With James and Sirius on his sides they were bound to see it, so he stuffed it in his robe pocket and continued to eat; well feign eating.

He was still thoroughly confused; was this letter from the future Snape? it have been the Snape in this time…James had said he had been there.

As his thoughts lingered on Snape he remembered those last moment's with the man in his subconscious. As he thought he came to a decision, he didn't care if his father and his friend fought with Snape; he wanted to become friends with the Snape in the past.

Julian knew he couldn't change the past or alter it in any way but he wouldn't abandon Snape when he had the chance of thanking this version of him in the way of friendship.

He thought sadly, in the future he was certain that Severus was dead. He had even felt the chill of the Dementors tenfold as they had approached on the battlefield.

The man had surprisingly meant so much to him when Remus failed as a caregiver. He didn't blame Remus of course and never would, in the time he was in now, Remus was a sweet, caring boy who when he grew up would face the rawest grief ever known to man.

He had lost his fiancé in battle and before that his best friends, two to death and one to betrayal. But no, Julian would never blame the man for suppressing to human emotions.

Severus had been there for him so many times that he had lost count. He would never fully understand the man, but he understood the many things he had done for him. To him, Severus had seen and suffered so much human torture from emotions and tragedy.

He had turned the light on somehow to Julian's some what bleak life.

As he thought back to the war of the future he had the sad thought that it would just happen again but by then he would either be dead or have a completely different life. It pained him but he knew Severus from the future had made this a reality so he could live on for happiness even if he knew the end was coming soon.

By the time he had finished thinking everyone at the breakfast table was finished. James and Sirius were itching to go do something or throw food at each other. It soon became the latter and Julian laughed lightly as Iris admonished them.

So the boys scuttled back upstairs and got changed hurriedly, James and Sirius itching to show him around the manor and grounds. Julian was so excited that he merely forgot about the letter he had gotten this morning that was in the pocket of his dressing robe.

**--------------------------------------------**

That afternoon, Iris and Jacob Potter watched in amusement from the second floor windows as Julian and James helped drag a besotted and dripping wet Sirius from the large pond in the back garden.

The two other boys were giggling like little girls, their son clutching his stomach in an act that showed that they were laughing that much. Julian was biting his lip to keep back the giggles but wasn't succeeding.

He had obviously been smart enough to know that laughing at the victim of the prank wasn't smart, especially when it was Sirius.

Iris sipped her tea and smiled over at her husband; she loved watching the boys when they were like this. So carefree and happy, it was as if they didn't know or want to realize that a new Dark Lord was out there. Or maybe they simply didn't care.

Iris Potter wished that it were always like this, happy, carefree and alive without some variation of a darkness rising looming over them; as happy as they were.

She knew one day that she would have to say goodbye to her dear son and Sirius, Remus and Peter who were just like sons to her. Maybe even Julian if he came to permanently live with them which was very possible.

Jacob smiled back at; boys will be boys were his only thought. He was so used to seeing this that it was almost custom and he loved everyday of it. He knew his son and his friends were pranksters and as much as Iris pretended to hate it, they both loved it.

They both loved their happy family like there was no tomorrow. He hoped things would never change.

His smile grew wider as he watched their new family member/guest. The small teen already fit in like the last piece in the jigsaw puzzles.

He still vividly remembered the Floo call from Albus and the stricken look on his wife's face as they were told the severity of what had happened to the poor boy.

Another thought that horrified Jacob was the terrors that Julian Knight had been through and to think he was around the same age as his own son!

He called the house elf, Twibit and arranged for him to meet the boys at the back door with towels; he definitely didn't want Sirius to catch a cold.

_Boys will be boys._

**--------------------------------------------**

After dinner and when Julian thought it was late enough, he settled on his bed with the letter in his hands. They were shaking slightly and he frowned, he swore that Severus had healed his nerves from the Crucio damage the first night back.

But then he realized it wasn't his wrist nerves playing up it was his emotional nerves, this letter that lay in his hands could really be from Severus! He didn't care which one; he just wanted to know what he had to say.

So he took a large gulp of his and opened the envelope again clumsily, sweat pooling in his fingertips and palms.

He gently lifted out the parchment and unfolded it, his contacts making the scrawl completely clear.

_To Mr Julian Knight,_

_I am writing on account that…_

**--------------------------------------------**

TBC…So what does Snape have to say? And which Snape is it??

**Extremely sorry I haven't updated in quite awhile!! I alternate on updates every week to manage my unfinished stories and then Deathly Hallows came out! **

I know that's a pretty lame excuse but I couldn't get over the events in that book and it stalled me!

Love it? Hate it?

So, please review (yes the little button down in the left hand corner, press "Go")

Thanks, till next time. Hopefully in next few weeks.

Yun


	6. Part 3 Section II: Dances are a Bother

Usual disclaimer and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all. I also changed Lucius Malfoy's age, hope you don't mind! NOT SLASH.

**Read Please, it clears EVERTHING up concerning time-wise:**

A/N: Okay, I started this before Deathly Hallows came out so basically the Marauder's era people are all born in 1959 in my story, not 1960 so bear with me! I got the dates etc from the HP-Lexicon and I'm still a tad confused.

Bear in mind that Lucius Malfoy was five years ahead of the Marauders so I changed it so he's the same age.

Basically the Lexicon states that in the Wizarding world a year for Hogwarts, age wise is September 1st of course, so I made James and Lily's birthday's the same as Deathly Hallows, March and January. So they are already Seventeen in 1976.

I also made it that Lucius turns eighteen before 1977, so technically he's too old for seventh year but hey, it's AU I can do whatever I want. As well as changing everyone's birthdates except for Harry/Julian, Lily and James, savvy?

I made up Sirius's birthday so it is in late June and Harry/Julian's birthday still stays in July. Later on I will mention Remus and Peter's birthdays but they will all be older than Harry/Julian.

So Harry has gone 21 years back in time, so he's just about to start seventh year with the Marauders. In his future time he would have just finished seventh year, I know, it's confusing. Request for the timeline if you want through a review or mail.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part three, Section II**

**Dances are a Bother**

And my limbs will go flying,  
And land before the ones that I love,   
Who would wail and would weep,  
But the robots would keep them at bay.  
While I shut my eyes,  
For the very last time.  
Citizens of tomorrow be forewarned-Citizens of Tomorrow, Tokyo Police Club.

_He gently lifted out the parchment and unfolded it, his contacts making the scrawl completely clear._

_To Mr Julian Knight,_

_I am writing on account that…_

**--------------------------------------------**

_May 1997_

_Severus Snape opened the parchment carefully, it was one of the few clean and flattened pieces of parchment in the whole place! He played with the end of the quill thoughtfully while surveying his surroundings._

_He was in his usual tent that he had transfigured for himself. It was his favourite Slytherin Green and he felt oddly at home. He managed to forget that outside was a chaos of thousands of tents, people awkwardly stumbling around._

_Medi-wizards running here and there, wounded aurors lying by sides of tents and bodies covered by un-decomposable blankets._

_Just beside his own tent was Harry's. He thought idly of the hours before when he had checked in on the sixteen year old. He had been sleeping, mostly like he did nowadays if there wasn't a battle nearby._

_He knew Harry still had terrible dreams, nightmares and repercussions of the battle that was everywhere around them. He had only been rescued a fortnight ago and Severus was very proud of his progress._

_Though he feared there was something worse below the surface for Harry, he hadn't been tortured endlessly for nothing in the past three months. Perhaps this was Harry's façade, pretending he was alright. He was so very good at that, Severus knew that every time he found him overdosed on a mood altering potion out the back of his tent._

_Severus looked back down at the parchment before dipping his quill in the ink pot, _

"_To Mr Julian Knight,_

_I am writing on account that…"_

_Once he finished the letter he sent it with a Gringott's time turner that was regularly used for wills. But this was different, he just prayed to Merlin it would arrive._

_If it did not, he would indeed despair._

**--------------------------------------------**

_June 1976_

Julian's eyes travelled over the parchment and once he finished reading he had tears rolling down his cheeks. He had to be careful of his contacts so he liberally wiped his eyes. After reading Severus's letter from the future, Julian thought he'd never be the same.

Once again he'd lost someone who he cared for and they cared for him in return.

As he wiped his eyes, he decided he really had better stop all this crying. People would think he was a girly prat like Malfoy. Then the thought came to him, whatever did happen to Draco?

Had the aristocratic boy survived the war on the Light or Dark side? He pondered on many different possibilities and lived to hope that the blonde haired teen had made it out alive and on a better side than he deserved.

He had irking that Draco had switched his loyalties because Severus had given subtle hints that his Godson had. But Julian still wasn't sure but he hoped that just maybe he had escaped his fate like Severus had done.

Even if he loathed Draco Malfoy, he never wished for such an evil fate as the one that his own Father bore onto his shoulders; a fate that would weigh him down and kill him in the end.

Back to looking at the letter, Julian read it again feeling an odd comfort at the words:

_I am writing to you on the account that I know your true identity. I realize now as I look back into my past memories of joy and happiness from my seventh year, it was you whom made it so._

_It is strange; the utter realization of a true identity that I some how stumbled on. But as I re-organise the facts it is indeed a cruel but bittersweet, twist of fate to see where I am now._

_As I write to you Mr Knight, your counter-part of your future self lies sleeping in the tent next to me. I smile at the irony at this, for I assure you I now know of the fate that will befall me and many others._

_You fought pain valiantly and you entrusted me with your care and safety, of all people you trusted me. I remember how vividly you tried not to cry as I carried you out. You are strong child, stronger than anyone I have ever known._

_Do not let it concern yourself of our fate, for awhile it lay in your hands and still does in a way. But I would like you to know, that every bit of yourself that you have shown me, I am proud of._

_I am proud of you, I am proud of you like a father is of his son. I never thought it possible for me to be able to convey my feelings and I am truly sorry it is through a mere letter._

_I just need you to know; I am and always will be proud of you. You are a son to me, a son I never had._

_You have grown into a mature young man that I never thought possible whilst I was meanwhile attempting to loathe you for crimes you are and did not commit. Even if I do look back; ironically James Potter was just being a teenager and I cannot hold that against him._

_I wish you luck in your future Mr Knight; perhaps we will run across each other, no matter the time dimension we stumble upon._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Severus Snape_

Inside the envelope, Julian saw a tiny speckled bit of gold and suddenly realized how Severus had gotten his letter across the time dimension. He remembered Remus writing out his will at Gringotts officially; Julian having gone with him.

He remembered how when he had finished he bought a tiny, intricately small pocket watch that did indeed look like a time turner. He then slipped it into the envelope and Julian had watched with widened eyes as it disappeared.

At Julian's shocked stare Remus had merely said, "No matter what the time I die or when I have wilfully chosen, it will appear to the sender through an owl just like usual. One day Harry, you shall have to write one too. As depressing as it is, these are very nifty little time turners."

The golden dust was what remained of the Time turner, over the time dimensions it was burned into nothing but gold dust. Julian smiled and had a childish urge to pour it out onto his palm and blow it away in the wind.

But he didn't. This was all that was left of the future presence, perhaps he would blow it away just before the moment he died. Perhaps.

Also, buried under the flecks of gold was a rusted key, quite small visibly but mysterious looking. Julian frowned, why on earth would Severus send a key? He shook his head; he couldn't think right now, he'd think about it later.

He carefully folded the parchment back and slipped it gently into the envelope before pushing it under his mattress and sighing. He smiled when he remembered the prank they'd finally managed to spring on Sirius.

All it took was the old Peter trick, the one that always used on Pettigrew. As Julian pointed a shooting star in broad daylight by the Potter pond as James knelt behind him. With a slight push Sirius went sprawling into the pond, head over backside while the other two laughed themselves silly.

Julian found himself laughing loudly and stifled it as two of the side doors open, a head peering through each. He then blushed as they gave him a weird look; he really needed to learn to control it. Perhaps he was going mad.

He noticed the look they gave each other before stepping out and shutting their doors simultaneously. He watched them walk over to his bed and sit down; James had a foreign look on his face. Sirius was much the same.

He looked expectantly at them as they silently decided who should talk first. Finally after Sirius having opened and closed his mouth several times, James spoke up, "Um Jules…I know-we know it must be hard for you. Maybe, maybe you should talk to us more about…about your childhood."

Julian was stalled by this; he wasn't sure what to say at the least so he stared out the window. The moon was luminescent and shining through the glass panels, high lighting their skin and eyes. It was almost glowing but hidden in a way that he could not describe.

He knew that as he looked away, James and Sirius were silently corresponding through looks; he didn't blame them either.

Whether or not he had a fabled childhood, his childhood was still even now hellish to him. He didn't like sharing it; he was ashamed of it and ashamed of himself for having to put up with it.

He was never a completely happy child he knew that, but sometimes once in a blue moon he had been happy.

He turned back to them, suddenly he was clammy and he couldn't stop fiddling with the bed sheets. He opened and closed his mouth several times and James looked on the edge of saving him from saying anything. But he didn't.

"Well as you know…my parents died-"Julian's heart gave a nasty twist at the irony of the conversation and he paused. He wasn't even sure if he could do this, talk to them, especially James about such a sensitive topic for him.

"They were killed by a dark wizard when I was a baby, I barely remember my parents-" It was only a whisper when he said those words and he found his throat constricted and his hands shook, "-But, but I love them just the same you know…they, they died for me and I-I never got to thank them,"

As he said this he finally managed to look up and stare right into James's hazel eyes, a serious glint as he did so. James looked back shocked, saddened by this and rested a gentle hand on Julian's shaking shoulders.

"My aunt, she took me in. She and her husband did. She was a muggle and basically so was I. They never told me properly what happened to my parents, they may well have been the villains in my life who had gotten themselves killed and left behind a stupid child."

Julian was shaking with anger now, remembering all the insults Petunia had used against him and her own sister. He clenched his fists around the sheets at the memories, how ever many millions there were.

"I lived with them until I was just eleven; I remember it so vividly you know. I was playing with a marble I had stolen in the gutter when this guy in a cloak walked by and pointed his wand at me and grabbed hold of me."

Julian stopped there, he didn't know whether to continue but he did know that the truth could never come out and if it did it had to be contained.

So he stopped there and looked away, he remembered how badly he had wanted James to know those words from the night before. How blissful he had felt as he had told James the truth. Then the coldness of seeing that blank look on his future father's face, it almost killed him; killed him to hide the truth.

James and Sirius must have understood that he could go no further and said nothing. The three sat in relative silence for awhile before a slight grumbling could be heard. Julian looked to the source which happened to Sirius as he rubbed his stomach, looking decidedly…hungry.

James and Julian laughed while Sirius looked indignant, "What!? I'm hungry!"

This just made them smirk and roll their eyes though James nodded, agreeing, "How bout a little hot chocolate and biscuit boys?"

Sirius was already on his feet and James followed, gesturing for Julian to hurry up.

As the other two thundered ahead and Julian vaguely wondered if they might wake Iris and Jacob up he also appreciated the beauty of Potter Manor.

The halls were only lightly lit, but the light shone on beautiful paintings that littered the corridors. Julian found himself stopping every now and then to watch the occupants as beautiful young girls brushed their hair and valiant messy haired youths rode horses; racing each other.

It wasn't until he came to a breath-taking painting of a young red haired woman sitting in front of a mirror, occasionally smiling a lovely smile as she fiddled with ornaments that arraigned her dresser.

She smiled at Julian as he stared at her in awe through the mirror before turning around and winking at him then resuming her spot. He bit his lips as she continued to fiddle in the portrait just before a voice spoke, "You like the self portrait I see,"

Julian whizzed round and found a smiling Iris behind him. He nodded vigorously and replied in awe, "It's a painting of you?"

She smiled warmly and nodded, gazing at the painting as she spoke, "Why yes Julian. It was painted when I was your age; it is a favourite picture of James and Sirius as well."

"You were so beautiful-and still are. Your hair, it was very red wasn't it?" Julian said while wistfully staring at the long mane of red hair as it fell down the young Iris Potter's back.

He turned back the older one; she was smiling just as beautifully as she did in the picture, "Why thankyou, you are far too kind. I understand that my son's crush, Lily Evan's has quite spectacularly red hair also?"

Julian just looked at her, not knowing what to say. This was the first time he had spoken about his mother and he was very much looking forward to actually meeting her.

She graciously smiled again before inclining her head, "Goodnight Julian. I hope the boys have left you some chocolate biscuits."

Julian nodded again before she turned and left. Iris Potter was a mystery and she very much reminded him of a younger Lily. He loved his future Grandmother already.

He stared at the portrait one more time before hurrying off to the kitchens, he did very much like chocolate biscuits and he had been deprived of them for so long.

**--------------------------------------------**

_April 1997_

_His insides churned dryly, he almost felt the bile rushing up and burning his throat as he swallowed it back down. Every now and then blood would drip from his nose and he would watch as it slowly descended to the floor before splattering against the dirty floor._

_The cell was rank now; he had been hanging from the tightly wrapped chains for a couple of days now. His body odour rank and vile, his own waste pooled at his feet._

_Every now and then Lucius or Avery or Nott would come in and give out a swift, powerful beating that left him half unconscious or close to death._

_It soon became such a routine that he wished he were dead, but he still clung on. So many people relied on him._

_At one such time he heard a different click of boots as they entered the tiled bathroom floor that doubled as a cell. He even tempted to raise his heavy head to see the identity of the person._

_The identity of the person he had laid his trust in, in just the short time of one month._

_Even with a mask he knew who it was, "S-Severus……"_

_A nice cool glass was lifted to his lips and a gentle voice directed him and he felt a wave of relief wash over him as he fell into a gentle lull, "Drink Harry, drink. It's going to be alright Harry; it's going to be alright…"_

**--------------------------------------------**

_June 1976_

When Julian was dragged out of bed by none other than a magical mechanism that pulled him by the toes he was rudely awoken to the sniggers of James and Sirius. He groaned as it dropped him back on the bed and they descended on him with expensive looking clothes.

He groaned and looked at them in question; something was up. They continued snickering before James feigned a look of shock, "Oh _sorry_ Julian, I _forgot_ to tell you that tonight is the annual Wizarding families ball!"

They snickered again and Julian's jaw dropped, "A _ball_!?"

James and Sirius pulled him out of bed and held up the emerald doublet robes against his body and nodded at each other, "Definitely the right colour, the girls will be all over him…" They muttered in agreement and Julian suddenly didn't feel too good.

"Do you mean ball as in dancing!?"

They both looked at him in mock surprise, "Why yes of course Jules! Everyone loves dancing! Especially when it's with gorgeous witches…" Sirius snickered and said in suave tone, wriggling his eyebrows.

This set Julian off, he hadn't gone to a ball, well since…the Tri-Wizard tournament and what a disaster that was.

He looked at them sheepishly and shrugged, "Uh guys….I don't do balls. I've….I've never been to one," He quickly improvised and looked sideways, perhaps he could escape….he didn't know if he could live through them getting him to try on outfits.

James patted him on the back and nodded vigorously, "No worries Jules, we know….we've got a crash course all ready for you, just follow our lead!"

Julian nodded weakly and suddenly wished that he could hide under his queen sized beds. He did not, do, dancing.

Hours later, just after lunch Julian found himself partnered up with an exuberant Sirius who was currently leading him in the wizard waltz around the empty hall.

House elves were quietly decorating the halls in a theme that particularly relayed on red and gold, typically Gryffindor colours. As Julian cautiously watched his feet because he continually trod on Sirius feet he barraged him with questions as James cheerfully clapped them in time.

"So which families-"

"Now, one-two-three and a one-two-three-"

"Shut up Prongs, Jules ere' is trying to ask me something, probably about the ladies,"

James looked put out but continued to tap his foot as they swivelled around, in time but clumsily on Julian's half.

"So which families will be present?"

Sirius alternated hands and laughed as he nearly tripped over, "Well they send out the invites, mainly when it's hosted by someone else only pureblood families are allowed, but the Potters' don't reckon so. But the _Malfoys_'-"He disgustedly shook his head at this, "- Are one of the main families that warrant an invite automatically."

Julian's stomach dropped to his feet, Draco had been bad enough but he only harboured false hate, when it comes to Lucius he bet a galleon that he hated Julian already or would when he met him.

Sirius was still talking so Julian tuned back in, "-Also the Snapes-" Julian's throat was painfully tight as he said that, he was aching to see his mentor once again, live and well,"

Sirius still continued, "-and Weasleys also warrant automatic invites, but the Potters' also invite the Evans and the Longbottoms. There are other families but they're typically boring as waffles if you get my drift Jules," Sirius and James both had disgusted looks at the name Snape, but said nothing.

Julian nodded before exhaustedly dropping Sirius's hands and blushing, he didn't ever think he'd been in the situation of ballroom dancing with his godfather.

It wasn't another second until James had his hands and was literally dragging him around the dance floor, "And a one-two-three-one-two-three…"

Julian groaned and James looked up from counting, "Seriously Jules, you do not want to humiliate yourself in front of high upstanding families, or the ladies for that matter, "He and Sirius snickered at that.

Julian rolled his eyes and led himself be led haphazardly through the dance, dragging his feet as he went.

He though was indeed looking forward to meeting a many people, young Severus, Lily Evans and Neville's beloved parents, young and refined, untouched and sane.

**--------------------------------------------**

Gasps met Julian when he stepped out of the bathroom, James and Sirius looked appreciatively at him and clapped him on the back.

"Wait to go Jules, looking good mate. You'll have the girls drooling over you, but not Lily Evans mind you, she's all mine." James managed to say, but he said the last part seriously and Julian put his hands up in peace.

"Point her out and I'll stay far away, I promise. So are Remus and _Peter _coming?" He asked and tried to keep the hatred out of his voice when he said the last name. He was though hoping that Remus would come. He very much liked the man.

James nodded and gestured for them to follow him out the door, "Of course, no way would this be a proper party without all of the Marau- I mean all of us." Julian nodded at the slip of tongue; James obviously had qualms over telling him all about themselves.

He frowned and followed the two, both wearing matching doublets in blue and crimson and they made their way down to the entrance. As they descended the stairs graciously Julian could hear the hubbub of a hundred or less people talking and laughing.

He could also hear a lovely sounding string quartet playing gentle dancing music and chinks of glasses and bottles echoing round the house.

As they came into view, the grand entrance hall chandelier shining brightly above all. He could just make out Iris dressed in beautiful lilac dress robes greeting people at the door with Jacob in a handsome navy robe.

Julian was astonished by the number of people and was led down the stairs dazed by an insistent James and Sirius.

"Come on Jules! We want you to meet some fairly good people, such as the Evans's!" James had spotted Lily and Julian heart leapt in his throat as he saw the shoulder length red hair.

As she turned around her mirror image eyes to his eyes brilliantly shimmered under the chandelier. His mother was just as beautiful as people described her and photos depicted her.

He could nearly cry right then and there.

He also saw the glint of love in James's hazel eyes as he spotted her and made his way over; the way he walked over there matched every step that he had to be with her. It was one of the happiest things Julian had seen.

Now he knew why they had married and nothing that he saw Severus's pensieve would stop him.

"Lily!" James called to her and she smiled a lovely smile and walked over. She wore a beautiful emerald dress robe with silvers lilies intricately woven into the velvet material.

A lovely pink blush rose in her delicate pale cheeks when James bowed and kissed her hand gently. To Julian it seemed that under the fiery temper and hard working ethics, his mother was like every other girl and didn't seem to mind James's attentions.

Sirius bounded up behind them and nodded smiling as he saw a nervous looking Alice Cooper and Frank Longbottom standing by the door. Julian turned to look at the pair, shock apparent in his eyes, an unknown sympathy as he saw their happy smiles as Sirius greeted them.

He watched on, saddened but rejoiced that he would meet them properly, if only Neville had been given such a chance. Suddenly he forgot all about Lily and wanted nothing more than to meet the young Longbottoms before fate would bewitch them from their only son.

He cautiously stepped over as Sirius guided him by the shoulder and as he felt the warmth of his Godfather's hand, he had a small thought. Even now, when Sirius was only a month old than him in context he still managed to seem like a fatherly figure to Julian.

He found it quite ironic and stifled a laugh before smiling at the pair in front of him.

Sirius clapped Frank on the back then kissed Alice's cheeks before standing in front of them, a supporting hand on Julian's shoulder.

"Frankie, Alice, this is Julian Knight. He's staying with the Potters like I am for the summer. I'm sure you'll find him very agreeable,"

Alice nee Cooper stood nervously smiling, her hand in Frank's as she blushed profusely, her hair cropped short in a pixie crop. Her cheeks were rosy and her skin pale, she was short and a little wide but she looked very friendly all the same.

She nodded at Julian before taking his hand in her both her own, her hair falling loosely over her dark eyes, "Nice to meet you Julian, you've settled well with the boys I see. It's great to have you here; I'm so sure you'll meet many nice people. I assume you're going to start at Hogwarts next year?"

Julian nodded, he looked into the eyes of the compassionate girl in front of him, "Of course Alice, it's great to meet you too. Well from what Professor Dumbledore has said I am to be sorted on September first."

Alice smiled brightly and let his hand go, "Let us hope you will be sorted into Gryffindor, we could do with a charming guy like you." She blushed afterwards and looked at Frank and smiled.

Frank was thin and wiry, his eyes warm and shining and his face had a certain boyish handsomeness that still possessed the quality the cheerful happiness.

He held his hand out strongly towards Julian who shook it and smiled at the stranger, "It's lovely to meet you Julian, I'm sure you'll enjoy yourself tonight. Next year it's our turn to host it, I'm quite looking forward to the fireworks!"

Frank stared back at Alice, nothing but a loving look in his light eyes. Sirius led Julian away, whispering in his ear, "They've been at love since second year and going out since fifth,"

Sirius and he continued to walk shoulder to shoulder, Sirius talking to many other youths whom Julian did not know on his way. He was now quite eager to see and meet his mother again and tried to look for her without being suspicious. Finally they found James, Peter, Remus and Lily standing by the punch bowl.

Remus greeted him warmly as he would have on any occasion whilst Julian grinned happily at him. He managed a neutral greeting to Peter before looking at Lily.

She smiled at him, her emerald orbs dancing under the light and her body swaying gently with the music. She stepped forward and inclined her head, "So you must be Mr Knight, Julian I presume? James was just telling me all about you and the pranks you have seemingly played on poor Sirius here,"

Her voice was almost like a songbird's, cheerful and reminiscently beautiful and light. He nodded, so entranced by the beauty of his mother, how he missed her so. It seemed even if he had never known her, seeing her so carefree and young here made his heart painfully twinge at the memory of her.

Seeing her right beside James just made the picture perfect, his parents' right here and here with him.

He finally managed to find his voice and he said what he could manage through the rather large lump that obstructed his way, "Y-Yes, Julian it is. You are Lily I assume? James has told me so much about you that I feel that I already know you,"

He succeeded in making James redder than a quaffle as he spluttered indignantly, "I err-I admit I do talk about you a lot, but you know it just sort of came….-naturally?" This just made Lily giggle and make James splutter even worse.

The whole group laughed and Remus managed to whisper in his ear, "Nice one Jules, I haven't seen James splutter like that since fifth year when a rather unfortunate…incident occurred."

Julian didn't even need for Remus to say much more, he knew exactly the incident.

Julian smiled; the scene in front of him right now was picture perfect, James red but still grinning the same at a smiling Lily, his arm around her waist gently. Sirius and Peter were guffawing in the background, Remus and Julian to the side smiling silently.

It seemed that Jacob Potter thought so too as he took out a foreign looking camera type object and pointed at them, while his son and friends laughed the camera flashed and the memory was kept forever. Kept forever moving; indeed it was a wizards camera.

Jacob smiled as it floated down in front of him and he caught it, soon Iris was looking over his shoulder grinning. So ever carefree the children were. Yes children they were, even at sixteen and seventeen. And into the world their children would leave, to unknown mysteries or horrors.

As parents they would only hope they would come back safe. But no need to worry over them now as they still had one last year of refuge, one last year at Hogwarts.

**--------------------------------------------**

A second slow song began after the beautiful one that James had led Lily into the dance floor to. Lily came back, face shining with rosy cheeks once again and she stopped in front of Julian.

When she graciously curtsied to him, it slight surprised Julian and he bowed back, confused. Remus nudged him and nodded, "She is inclining for you to dance with her,"

Still confused he stared and waited, Lily stared back before giggling, "If I may pertain Mr Knight, will you take my hand so graciously and forward me towards this dance?"

Julian's eyes widened and he nodded, clumsily taking his mother's hand as she led him away to the dance.

James grinned after him and called after him round the many other people watching the various couples dancing, "Don't you try to steal her away now Jules! Just joking!"

Julian smiled weakly as he nearly tripped over another couple and Lily tried to keep a straight face. This just made the Marauders laugh harder as they continued to watch. Sirius nudged James, "Perhaps those crash course dancing lessons weren't so good after all, or perhaps we made a tiny smidgen of a difference. I'd have hated to be Lily beforehand,"

They continued to snicker before Peter spoke up, "Uh Oh, guys. Look who's coming our way!" He almost squeaked and rudely pointed to the pair making their way over.

Sirius hissed and James tensed visibly, clutching his wand that was hidden in his robe sleeve, Remus's eyes narrowed but he put a steadied hand on Sirius's shoulder and grabbed Peter, pulling him close.

They managed to compose themselves just before the pair reached them, the first one speaking, "I see your _unclean _manor has scrounged up enough to make it _fit_ for a ball. Though I must say, it is becoming even dirtier with all these _filthy Mudbloods_ wandering round, _dancing_ and such."

The sharp voice of Lucius Malfoy was heard and James fisted his wand tightly as soon as he heard the word 'Mudblood', looking cautiously over at Lily and Julian who were still dancing.

Lucius followed his gaze; his eyes flickered as they rested on Julian. Sirius and Remus tensed and stepped forward not even wanting to hear what he might say next.

"It's your little friend Severus, the one whom you went to watch through the door in the infirmary," He said in a sweetened voice that had menace underlying its tone, he turned round to the second stranger in the pair.

Sirius growled and James whipped out his wand pointing it straight at the second person now in front of them, "_Snivellus_! What business would you have with Julian?"

Severus Snape, age seventeen stepped forwards, nearly until James's wand was touching his face and pushed it away with swat of his hand, "What business you ask? Well I was there that night if you would remember, _Potter_."

Snape spat with more viperous tone than Lucius had as he turned his gaze back to the stranger, Julian Knight.

Julian was happily laughing as Lily had finally managed to learn the dance and he was now trying to keep the conversation with Lily interesting and keep his feet in time. Finally they fell into a tangle of laughter and feet as the song finished.

He led Lily off the dance floor, not looking where he was going and ran smack bang into a broad chest, only a little taller than himself.

He gasped when he met the familiar hooked nose and look of disdain that had often irked him so, only to step backwards into the hem of his robes. Finally taking in the scene before him he unconsciously pushed Lily gently towards James.

Sirius and James stood in front of Peter and Remus, both looking visibly angry and tense, Remus attempting to hold them back.

In front of them stood Lucius Malfoy, a smirk upon his high cheek boned, narrow face and beside him, in front of Julian stood a tall, teenage Severus Snape. He wore a look of contempt and shock marring his own youthful face as he gazed at Julian.

"Stumble upon our midst have we Mr Knight? My, my, my, it seems you were found by a group of gangly, idiotic Gryffindors." Were the first words out of Severus's mouth as his lip curled in disdain and he looked back up at Lucius, a smirk now on his lips.

Julian rolled his eyes; he was used to this by now. Even by the standards of a younger Severus, that one was hardly creative. Perhaps he was still practising for when he was older.

Lucius obviously didn't like his subtle indifference and grabbed his arm as he turned round, the older teen's grip was biting and he just gritted his teeth and turned back around.

James and Sirius leapt to attack Lucius and Snape was poised to curse but Remus held them back and Lucius put a restraining hand on Snape's chest. "Not now dear Severus, it would be a ticket for us to leave if we started a fight. Couldn't have that could we?"

Severus shook his head but still fingered his wand, though his gaze lingering on the tightened grip that his friend had on Julian's arm. He also noticed that many had stopped dancing to watch, but the majority was still preoccupied with the dance that the String Quartet was playing.

Lucius turned back to the Marauders and Julian, an unpleasant smile upon his face, "From what I heard, you were found half dead by these filthy blood traitors and half-bloods. Pity you weren't dead if you have decided to maraud around this lot. Do you even know what you are? A pureblood or-"

"Don't even say it Malfoy! This is my home and I will not have you insulting my friends or guests!" James finally spoke up and pointed his wand at Lucius, his eyes wavering on Julian who had gone white.

Lucius merely purred, a fake smile directed at James, "Why Potter, I didn't know you had it in you. I presume as before your interruption that he is a mu-"

He didn't get to finish the sentence because Julian's fist connected with his jaw and a crack resonated around the ballroom, the string quartet and everyone silenced.

"Don't you _ever_, say that word to me, or anyone you hear me _Malfoy_!? Ever!" He spat before turning and leaving the room. Lucius nursed his jaw with an angry glint in his ice cold, grey eyes as they followed him out of the room.

Severus stood quiet, shocked, his mouth still agape as he too watched Julian leave. James and Sirius were white while Lily looked thoroughly upset. Peter didn't know how to react except to emit a small squeak.

It was finally Remus that huffed an angry sigh in the general direction before rushing off to follow Julian.

The ballroom was still, deathly silent.

**--------------------------------------------**

**TBC…**

Well, have a fairly long chapter my loyal readers. It's a good sixteen pages long and a good six thousand five hundred words before I go on holidays to Melbourne. So I won't be posting for the next fortnight, savour this.

I'd really, really like it if some more people would take a small percentage of their time compared to my time in writing this, to actually write a review.

I'm holding out on you guys, I see all you people reading and adding me to your alert lists but I don't hear a peep from you.

If you don't then I guess I'm not going to stop the world or the story, but I'd just appreciate it you know?

Thanks for reading! I'll be back in about three week's time hopefully.

Yun


	7. Part 4 Section I: Cry,for what its worth

Usual disclaimer and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all. I also changed Lucius Malfoy's age, hope you don't mind! NOT SLASH.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part four, Section I**

**Cry, for what its worth**

I'm so tired,  
I've had enough,  
If there's one thing I've learned,  
You'll always get burned,  
But you'll never give it up-Point of Extinction, Motion City Soundtrack

"_Don't you ever, say that word to me, or anyone you hear me Malfoy!? Ever!" He spat before turning and leaving the room. Lucius nursed his jaw with an angry glint in his ice cold, grey eyes as they followed him out of the room._

**--------------------------------------------**

_March 1997_

"_No Harry! NO!" Hermione was screaming as she clutched at his arm and attempted to drag him backwards. Ron was grabbing his other arm and another round the smaller boy's waist._

"_Don't rise up to the bait, don't Harry." He whispered into his best friend's ear, all the while eyeing the Deatheaters in front of them with contempt. He squeezed his friend's shoulder reassuringly, his grip lax._

_Harry, his eyes blazing, muscles tense and limbs struggling wildly trembled in his best friend's arms._

_The circle of Deatheaters laughed at him which caused Harry to grow even angrier._

"_Mudblood Potter. That's what your friend and mother is, pity we cannot reduce your friend here to dust, just like her…your dear old, dead, mother."_

_Lucius Malfoy's voice was slightly muffled under his mask, but Harry could sense a smile radiating from the man, and he lunge, Ron's grip terribly lax now._

_Only when he came in contact with a portkey did he realize his mistake; the last thing he heard was his friends screaming his name._

**--------------------------------------------**

_June 1976_

"Julian?" Remus ventured carefully, the raven haired boy was in a small alcove crouched, his face buried in his hands. His shoulders were shaking and handed trembling.

He knelt beside the boy and reached out a hand to lay it gently on the younger boy's shaking shoulder; but he withdrew quickly when Julian flinched violently.

Remus sighed gently and moved closer, "Julian? Julian, what's the matter? You should not heed Malfoy's words they are…"

"True." Was Julian clear answer, but he still did not turn around. He fell backwards and leaned into Remus's touch gently, silently crying now. Remus sorrowfully smiled and comforted the boy as best as he could.

For some reason Julian continued to cry until he heard a slight movement behind them. Both Remus and Julian turned swiftly to greet the offending person or persons.

James threw his hands up in peace before kneeling beside them and talking softly to Julian.

"You saw left a shiner on good ol' Malfoy, bet he's feeling the effects of it, if his mummy hasn't already fixed it…" He laughed weakly before turning a sorrowful look upon the younger boy.

"Julian…I'm sorry,"

"It's not your fault."

"But I am, this happened in _my_ house. You're _my_ guest and…-"

"-And I shouldn't haven risen up to the bait."

It seemed that this last sentence acquitted the whole conversation and Julian pulled himself up to his feet and stared at them. He felt like such a fool!

He cautiously ran a still trembling hand through his unruly locks, not even realizing he was smearing blood throughout and sighed.

It was not until James held his injured hand carefully and tugged him towards the bathroom; Julian did not protest and followed his friend knowing fully that James would take care of him.

In the bathroom a mirage of shining tiles mirrored the walls in the shapes of spouting whales, Julian had a fleeting thought at how muggle the bathroom looked for a purely magic house. He soon found himself laughing, no giggling at the shear obscurity of it, James held him back with both wrists in a gentle grip, his concern obvious upon his handsome face.

"Julian? Julian? What's wrong? Tell me Jules, it's scaring me, please Julian," James attempted to catch the distraught boy's gaze but with no avail, the green eyed teen was raucously laughing, his head thrown back and tears of hysteria dropping from his eyes.

His mouth upturned in a look of such sadness that it made James's heart clench as he pulled him closer, "What horrors have you faced? What nightmares have made you remember such madness?" He whispered into the raven hair, signalling such a height difference between the two.

The boy was sobbing now, his wrists falling easily from James's lax grasp, his whole body wracked with shame, his thin figure almost doubled over, he was whispering repeatedly, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…"

James lost track of the moment in time, so lost in his emotions of helplessness and sympathy that he did not realize when his father pulled Julian from his arms and carried him to bed and his mother wiped her son's face carefully, a look of deep worry glinting in her gentle eyes.

Remus and Sirius stood in the doorway, Peter having taken Lily back to her house and would try to return later.

The party atmosphere was gone, it now being half past midnight and all guests gone, for once in a long time, Potter Manor was not bubbling with happiness, it was strangely empty.

James sat on the rim of the bathtub, his face buried in his hands as his mother kissed his forehead gently and nodded at his two best friends before closing the door.

Sirius and Remus were uncertain what to do and when they finally decided how to help James stood up and rushed past them, pausing at the door knob, "We have to help him, I don't know how he has survived whatever horrors he has witnessed, but we will; help him." He said with a strange glint of determination in his eyes before he turned and ran.

He couldn't stand this, this stranger had walked into his life unwillingly and had no idea in hell what kind of impact he had had on one James Potter and his Marauder friend's lives.

**--------------------------------------------**

_March 1997_

_They landed with a solid thump and a splat as Harry's knees gave out and he felt in a boneless heap. He already knew struggling was going to be in vain so he didn't even bother._

_Nor did he protest when the Deatheaters roughly hoisted him to his limp, numb legs and dragged him down a dark corridor._

_He breathed in slow, shallow breaths, fearing that if he breathed any louder someone would kill him._

_Yes, he ultimately feared one thing._

_Death._

_Let it not be soon!_

_As they threw him into a windowless cell he landed painfully on his right side, hearing a snap somewhere in his body. He closed his eyes tightly and sucked in a sharp breath before letting his body relax and fall limp._

_The cold floor felt horrible to his exposed skin but he simply sighed and looked up to the ceiling; if you could even call it that._

_He let his head fall back as a shiny tear of despair pooled in his eyes before dribbling down his dirty cheeks. He was scared but relieved at the same time._

_They hadn't taken his friends, they were most possibly safe and back at camp._

_As he stared upwards his vision started to cave and in exhaustion he let his eyelids droop and fall; his unconscious mind took over and he slept in peace._

_For awhile._

**--------------------------------------------**

_June 1976_

The morning sun shone dully as if signalling such a depression of happiness, the clouds had flittered lazily over the sun, it only peeking through as if hoping to regain its full light.

The occupants of Potter Manor were subdued and its guests rather unable to think properly. Remus had slept over in Sirius's room whilst James had stood guard in a chair beside Julian as he slept fitfully. His crying had driven him to exhaustion.

As a bird sang loudly by the window James rubbed his hands over his face as if to wipe whatever emotion he had felt away. He turned to the bed's occupant and grimaced, Julian had haphazardly sprawled himself over the covers; his fingers clutching his pillow in a vice grip.

It was obvious Julian had not slept peacefully that night. Only James's presence calmed him little but his whimpers were not entirely quietened.

James's face was anguished throughout the night as he heard murmurs, desperate murmurs of, "Mum," and "Dad," thoroughly repeated in the night, he could only close his eyes in sadness to think what life could be without his parents.

He couldn't.

James stopped himself from grabbing the complacent teen's hand but comforted himself by wrapping his arms around himself, "I'll fix you Julian Knight, no matter what, and I will fix you."

Sirius and Remus woke later in the morning, drawing dressing robes over their boxer clad bodies as they huddled round the bed. Sirius was no longer cheery and Remus seemed to be lost and unable to think of at least something to do.

James was never this hardened before, his friend had analysed, James had such a cocky innocence that no one had ever wanted to take away, that is what made him, him.

But Julian, his innocence had seemingly been ripped away from him at an entirely too young age and now James had a second-hand account of what life could really do. What horrors could mar the mind and body of a child; a child, that's what Julian and that's what everyone was, a child.

So lost in the thoughts were the remaining marauders that they did not even notice a slight stirring from the bundle on the bed. It wasn't until a groan was heard that their attention was quickly averted.

Green eyes met hazel, the green looked away and a look of such humiliation devastated his youthful face. His whisper was only just caught by the three boys, "I'm sorry." He managed as he fiddled with his clean fingernails, and sheets.

James shook his head looking directly into Julian's eyes; he moved closer and shook his head forcefully again, "No. No Julian, stop apologising. You, you can't blame yourself, it wasn't your fault."

Julian just looked down and attempted to avert his gaze to look anywhere but the three boys.

Silence is an ambient thing, it can signal a silent happiness perhaps, an awkward silence of not knowing what to say, or a silent sadness where everyone involved too afraid to speak for not knowing what emotions they may conflict.

"Everything is my fault James, everything. He whispered before meekly pushing back the cover, his whole body shivering as his bare feet touched the floor. This went unnoticed by James and he cracked a weak smile and playfully poked Julian.

"What have I told you about wearing the bed socks the house elves gave you?" He scolded before walking over to the armoire and going through the draws.

With a triumphant smirk he grabbed the thick socks out of the second draw and walked over to the silent boy. He knelt down and mercilessly tickled Julian's feet before pulling the socks over his friend's freezing feet.

"Do it again Jules and I will tickle you till you can't breathe!"

Julian smirked at this, "I'd like to see you try."

It was the wrong thing to say because James, Sirius and Remus shared a look before launching themselves onto the helpless teen and tickled him senseless.

"Alright, alright! You can, okay! I know you can!"

The boys were outside traipsing around in the rose garden playing wizard tag. Wizard tap consisted of rings you were on your index finger and once you were it you got the ring.

Now whenever you found someone and 'tagged' them, let's just say they didn't get a mere tag.

James and Julian were paired together, as Remus was all alone and Sirius was it. The two snapped around when they heard the sound of boots crunching upon gravel. They knew it had to be Sirius because Remus never wore boots.

Before they knew it, the two were scrambling to hide as the person descended upon the rose garden.

James stifled his giggles and covered Julian's own his large hand before rolling on to his stomach in silent laughter.

Julian meanwhile had composed himself and watched Sirius go past looking quite severe with his hand outstretched, the bulky tag ring on his fingers, the top of the ring on the inside of his palm.

He also had on a wide brimmed black hat with string tied under his chin and an oversized black cloak that he liked to flourish and the final touch, a mask that made him look indefinitely like Zorro.

Not that Sirius would ever know that, Julian would swear on Merlin that Sirius would have never been so muggle inclined in his whole entire life. Same went for all the Marauders.

Just as he thought Sirius was gone, he leapt over the roses bushes to go off running when someone grabbed him by the waist.

"Got you now Knight!" Sirius's voice tickled the hairs on his neck as he laughed raucously.

Soon he was picked off his feet and spun around in the arms of Sirius, the only person that voice could have belonged to.

Meanwhile as Sirius ran in faster circles, he gasped for breathe, continuing to ask, "What? ...How? I saw you….Sirius!"

Finally he was deposited a little roughly on the ground and the older teen pressed his palm on the back of Julian's neck.

_Zzzzz._

"Hey! OUCH!!"

"You're it!" Sirius screamed almost hysterically before ripping off the ring and running.

Before he knew it _two_ Zorro like figures sped off running and he could hear James cackling madly, still behind the rose bushes.

"Damn." Julian managed to mutter as both _Remus_ and Sirius ripped off their masks and ran full pelt across the field.

Before James even knew what had hit him, Julian had shoved the tag ring onto his finger, ran full power to the rose bushes, leapt over and ungracefully tackled James in one hit.

_Zzzzz._

"OUCH!"

"You're it!"

Thud.

Bump.

_Zzzzz._

"OUCH!"

"You're it!"

Thud.

Bump.

_Zzzzz._

"OUCH!"

"You're it!"

**--------------------------------------------**

**TBC…**

So…pathetically short I know. I know also that I said I'd update when I got back from Melbourne and that never happened, so I'm very sorry and I hope you can forgive me.

I decided to add the game of tag actually, when I thought about it, it sounded like fun.

Welcome new readers and reviewers! Lovely to hear from you!

Thankyou to everyone again for reviewing and/or adding me to your alert/favourites list! Happy New Year!

Thanks especially to: **Anave Lipad, LaughableBlackStorm, Sylkie, ****La-p'tite-tete****, Authoroftherose, MaryKay13, Dee, Dinawen and MidnightAbyss **for your reviews on the last chapter.

See you next chapter hey?

Yun


	8. Part 4 Section II: A Sirius Birthday

Usual disclaimer and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all

Usual disclaimer and Dumbledore is not dead in this story and Horcruxes aren't really focused on at all. I also changed Lucius Malfoy's age, hope you don't mind! Not slash. I've also swapped around a lot of birth dates!

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part four, Section II**

**A Sirius Birthday**

Burning bridges is a form of suicide,  
I saw the fire as a ghost in my life,  
Passed me by and there is nowhere you can hide,  
From the lessons or the lies you'll find out-Point of Extinction, Motion City Soundtrack.

_James's face was anguished throughout the night as he heard murmurs, desperate murmurs of, "Mum," and"Dad," thoroughly repeated in the night, he could only close his eyes in sadness to think what life could be without his parents._

_He couldn't._

**--**

_June 1976_

"Happy Birthday Padfoot!"

Cheers and hoots went up in the Potter Manor entrance hall and rough housing immediately began on the birthday boy. The entrance hall been transformed into a party room of sorts, the first thing was to remove anything breakable.

Iris Potter sighed in relief as Sirius and James pulled each other in headlocks near to where her favourite vase used to stand and groaned as her husband started to join in.

She cringed visibly before Jacob pulled her into a quick hug and handed her the camera, "Amuse yourself Love, I'm sure the boys would just love having their picture taken," He grinned and started to join in, his son being his first victim.

Iris grinned, when she was much younger she had loved magical photography. It had become her hobby and as James grew up she had filmed albums upon albums of him and their beautiful family.

In later albums a much younger Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew and Remus Lupin sidled in and had made themselves part of the family. Part of the memories in Potter Manor.

Now Julian would do so too.

"I'm of age, I'm of age!! Ha!! I can drink, I can apparate, and I can do ungodly deeds with women and….." Sirius was shouting at the top of his lungs to a giggling James, a blushing Julian, a very disapproving Iris and a quite nonchalant Jacob.

Remus rolled his eyes and so did James, "We've been able to do those acts for quite awhile now Sirius, oh baby of the family." James teased before turning bright red as his mother raised his eyebrows at him.

Julian giggled and it wasn't long before he was swept in, getting the tickling of a lifetime by a much taller James.

"But that isn't true!! Julian's birthday isn't till July!! So Julian is the baby!!" James cooed at him and lifted him off the ground and started to spin.

Remus although placid looking itched to join in and he didn't even have to begin the debate with himself because he was soon pulled into the wrestle by Sirius. Strangely enough yet so un-so Julian, he was running away from James like a mad child running from an older sibling before resting as James tackled Sirius and Remus.

Julian fidgeted for a little while longer before he was hauled into a crushing bear hug from Sirius. James slapped Julian on the back and Remus winked, "Come on Jules, get in and have some fun!"

Julian laughed lightly while he fought to hold the tears back, this was what life could have been like; it made his heart lighter with joy, but sorrowed and heavily laced with sadness as well.

Just as boys do, Sirius released him quickly and thrust him towards James and they started a light game of washing machine, not jostling him too hard for fear of scaring him. They played that for awhile until it was Remus, last who was shoved into the centre and thrown around haphazardly.

A large doorbell resounded around the entry hall and Iris paused from taking a photography midway and smiled fondly, "That must be Peter, he's quite late." She looked at the Grandfather clock across the hall.

She clicked the shutter once more before, with a broad smile opening the door graciously for Peter.

The teen stood nervously fidgeting, his eyes on his cleanly polished shoes, that his mother had no doubt done for him and his eyes lifted to look at Iris. He smiled at her shyly as she gestured him into the house and it wasn't long before his nicely gelled hair was messed up by Sirius's knuckles.

Petey-boy, you made it!" Sirius managed to exclaim before wrestling the poor boy to the ground, "Dog pile!" James shouted, his voice echoing before launching himself up and over to land on the two.

Grunts and 'oofs' came from under the pile as Julian launched himself last but not least, on top of the pile. This reminded him so much of the times at the Burrow with all the Weasley brothers, just before the war when Bill and Charlie could make it home, a good game of rough housing _always _commenced.

Much to Mrs Weasley's horror and Ginny's delight, poor Harry and Ron always seemed to be found on the bottom.

Finally everyone hauled arse and crawled off poor Peter who seemed to be wheezing and gasping for breath even as James pulled him to his feet.

"Food?" Remus said with a perfectly arched eyebrow and that's all it took for the five to start running with a laughing Jacob and exasperated Iris in tow.

**--**

The shutter clicked and Iris happily grinned at the picture of a scowling James with cake smeared all over his lips and a smirking Sirius with his arms around James neck.

Iris cooed over her son while trying not to laugh as her son fought her off as she tried to wipe the offending cake off his face.

James swatted at her scowling, "Mum!! Stop babying me in front of friends!! Go baby Julian; he's obviously the baby of the family!"

James continued to swat until Iris settled near Julian and placed her hands lightly on the boy's shoulders; he tensed visibly.

Iris smiled sadly but didn't move her hands and proceeded to hug Julian gently. Julian finally relaxed under her motherly touch and smiled up at her; a new emotion dancing in his eyes.

He was eating his cake very carefully with a dessert spoon, careful not to leave any crumbs which could not be said for Sirius and James who were currently on the verge of starting a food fight.

Were it not for Iris's presence perhaps then it would have begun just after Sirius blew his magical cracklers out.

Jacob had escaped early, saying that "his garden was in need of pruning" or something odd like that. Whatever it was, it caused Remus and Peter to spit out their last morsels of cake and James and Sirius to crack up laughing.

Julian, of course was oblivious.

He did although roll his eyes when he thought no one was looking, which of course they weren't for Remus was the ever observant one.

Sirius broke the silence after the immediate joke and tugged at Iris's hand, whining like a puppy.

"Presents!! Presents!!" Everyone grinned and half heartedly followed Sirius into the family room where of course a rather large pile was sitting by the lounge chairs. Sirius bounded over to them while everyone else settled on the floor and in the chairs.

Jacob rejoined them with a quiet snicker from his son.

Sirius ripped the present wrappings to shreds like a wild animal and glee lit up his face as each item was unwrapped.

"Oh thankyou so, so much Iris! Jacob!" He practically screamed at them as he nearly launched himself at the couple clutching the brand new Storm 99 broom which had only been released that summer.

James of course had an identical one which he received in March for his birthday, pre-release thanks to Jacob and his contacts.

He rolled his eyes at the thoughtful gift of Remus's, a book titled "100 barks for a Rabid Dog" and huffed at the chew toy from Peter in conjunction with Remus's gift.

He punched his best mate's arm as he revealed the subscription to Wizard's Weekly, the current edition containing a very scantily clad witch on the front cover. James and Jacob grinned at each other while Iris rolled her eyes.

A very nervous Julian shuffled over to Sirius, his eyes on the floor, a nicely wrapped parcel in his hands.

He presented it to Sirius who seemed to have calmed down marginally and was looking intently at the younger boy.

"I-I haven't anything to buy you something and I'm sorry that my gift isn't as good as everyone else's….I don't err, have access to funds at the moment so I made you something. I um….hope it isn't too lame, I learnt a knitting spell back in isolation and…."

Julian trailed of with a nervous laugh, his eyes refusing to meet those of the people around him.

Iris and James had offered to give him money to buy something for Sirius but he had politely declined, deciding that he would make something from his own magic for his future Godfather.

At first he had thought it to be a marvellous idea, back in the war when Hermione was bored she continued her old hobby of knitting items of clothing for comfort or just to waste time. She had long ago learnt a knitting spell to save her the time and much harder effort.

Hermione had become so good at the knitting spell that she could weave multicoloured scarves and hats and knit two things at once.

Harry had been so amazed by her magic that he had asked to learn the spell in pure bored ness, but deep down he knew it was neat.

But now as he looked back, he would never be as good as Hermione with the spell and his recently knitted dark blue and grey scarf and hat didn't look to good.

He knew he missed loops with his wand and stuffed up some of the pattern partially, and he cringed as Sirius opened the paper carefully.

Sirius swallowed loudly as he pulled the garments out, his eyes searching everything possible on them and then his eyes sharply moved up to search Julian's face.

Julian was fiddling with his hands and refused to meet the other's gaze and he could feel the heat radiating in the room that was everyone's stares.

Finally he glanced up through his fringe to find Sirius staring intently at him before he was pulled into a rough, but kind hug which shocked him to the core. When Sirius released him everyone else was chatting about trying to not draw attention to the moment between them.

Sirius smiled at him and Julian found himself smiling back.

"Thankyou. There's nothing better than a warm set of a gloves and a hat, thankyou sincerely Julian." He gave Julian such a kind look that Julian had to look away, he wondered if Sirius had still retained this loving kindness in him in the future.

Of course he had.

Sirius grinned at him before yanking them on to his hands and head, the grey bobble on the top of his head wildly moving about as he jumped up, grasping Julian's arm.

Together they stood up; Julian timidly looked at Sirius and James and was met with a grin.

Soon he was tugged and like a whirlwind the boys ran laughing down corridors and staircases, their feet pounding the timber and portraits laughing gaily as they passed, until they came to the open space of the clean, prim and blindingly green quidditch pitch.

Soon they were spinning, spinning like little children with their arms thrown out like aeroplanes, spinning like the world would never end. Spinning like the world didn't matter for just that moment in time.

They laughed loudly and giggled like little boys until they fell together in a heap, dizzy and exhausted but as happy as they could ever be.

Carefree.

--

Later that night after the boys had entertained themselves (Jacob included) with water fights, mock quidditch games and of course tag; they were exhausted.

Sirius, the most exuberant of the lot looked just about to fall asleep into his mashed potatoes while James continued to stare ahead into the mesmerising flames of the fire.

Peter looked just about conked and Remus was drinking a strong and mature coffee brew just to keep his eyes open. Jacob looked just about done; maraudering around like a sixteen year old when he was in fact in his late forties did nothing for his physique.

Julian though, was almost wide awake. The day of fun having been taxing on him but he also found himself grinning non-stop at the progressively fun day with what he could call his family.

Iris was smiling secretly, her rosebud lips upturning into a small curve at she surveyed her family over her tea cup.

It couldn't get any better than this.

--

**TBC…..**

This chapter is a minor chapter and thankyou to all those people who have stuck with me since I last updated, (nearly a year ago) and who have taken the time to review!

THANKYOU! I do believe you've made my day.

Also, I would really love if more people would participate in the poll on my bio page concerning this story.

I like to write stories where people have a choice! So, I need clear majorities in these polls for YOUR story :)

Also, got any suggestion or theories you might like to see in the story? Just put it in your review and I'll consider it as long as it goes with the direction the story is going in. I'm open for anything, because this is YOUR story!

So the poll is: "**How should Snape & Julian/Harry become friends in SAoTaC?**"

Please vote on my author page!

Thankyou so much to the following people: **La-p'tite-tete****, Parseltongue girl, Fufu.a.k.a.speechless, MidnightAbyss, Neko-hanyou05, Authoroftherose, Sylkie, HermioneWatsonFan, Cedric55d, Iriomote Yamaneko Nokomis, Animehpgurl, The-Resident (****Thankyou Times 2****), Hentai18ancilla (****Thankyou Times 2****), Lina03, MariaEsmereldaDumbledore-Black, CrazySmallLady, FairyTails13 (****Thankyou Times 2****) and Creampuff **for your recent reviews.

: )

See you next chapter, until then : )

Yun

P.S Interested in World War II mixed with Harry Potter? Check out "London's Burning", my new story I've been working on : D


	9. Part 5 Section I: Dispute Among Us

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine, it belongs to J.K Rowling, song lyrics are not mine either, they belong to the related artists each chapter.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part Five, Section I**

**Dispute Among Us**

A warning sign,  
I missed the good part then I realized,  
I started looking and the bubble burst.  
I started looking for excuses-Warning Sign, Coldplay

_Iris was smiling secretly, her rosebud lips upturning into a small curve as she surveyed her family over her tea cup._

_It couldn't get any better than this._

_April 1997_

"_Why are you not laughing Snape? Not enjoying yourself enough? I'm sure you gain pleasure from knowing that my father rolls in his grave."_

_Harry spat out the blood that rolled over his tongue and down his throat. His glare intensified as he nodded towards Lucius who stood by the door, surveying the beating from under a glinting mask. Purring like a predator, cold, pale eyes staring; Harry knew there was a malicious grin hidden also under the metal._

_Snape stared down at his victim. Wand trained, a cold, but absent look in his face. Harry grovelled and crawled across the dirty floor, a strange smile passing across his split lips. _

_Obsidian eyes narrowed when Harry clutched his robe in a broken fist and many thoughts ran through his mind. What on earth is the child doing?_

_Lucius laughed, the sound bouncing and echoing off the tiled walls and floor as he turned his heel, most likely to tell the tale of Harry Potter grovelling at the feet of the Potions Master._

_Snape watched his old school friend leave before turning to his student. His eyes boring holes into Harry's own green eyes, he lowered his wand._

"_Whatever you may think Mr Potter, I hardly deem settling hatred upon a child's shoulders, as adequate. I loathed your father, I always will. But I will never loathe you."_

_A flask of water was dropping by Harry's hands as Snape pulled his cloak out of the teenager's grip, turned his heels and locked the cell door._

"_I cannot hate you."_

_It was a mere whisper in the darkness as it swallowed the tall silhouette, but Harry heard it nonetheless._

_July 1976_

Julian awoke with a gasp. His eyes clenched and hands clasping the duvet like there was no tomorrow. He finally let go, blood returning to his fingers as he brushed his fringe out of his face; hands shaking.

His linen pyjamas were soaked with sweat and he shifted out of his bed, rubbing the grit and sleep from his eyes. Lifting his legs over to the side, he rummaged blindly through his bedside table draw and found his contacts.

Wobbling slightly he got up, using the mattress to stand and made his way over to the ornate, fleur de lis mirror; his blurry reflection staring back at him.

Meticulously he opened the small container, and leaned forward, peering at himself, carefully pushing the contacts onto his eye. He did this once more before smiling weakly.

He hadn't looked in a mirror very often. His cheekbones shone under the hearth light, sticking out, a concave of skin underneath them and his eyes. From the horrors he witnessed his eyes retained an olive green colour, blending in with his pale complexion.

His hair was long, curling around his jaw line and obscuring his ears and the back of his neck. Iris wanted to cut it, she'd brandished a pair of scissors but had grown alarmed when Julian had flinched and crouched back against the kitchen cupboards.

Like a flash he remember Aunt Petunia doing the same thing, anger in her eyes as she strode purposefully towards him and had cornered him against the sink. There, Harry had little choice but to whine pitifully as she chopped away his hair, cutting the skin along his ears and neck in the process until he was as bald as an egg.

His hair grew back the very next day and when Uncle Vernon hauled him out of the cupboard, Petunia had screamed and brandished the scissors again, this time leaving painful gashes in her wake.

The next day, Petunia refused to look at Harry.

She ignored him for the rest of his life.

Julian rubbed his neck before looking down into the collar of his pyjama shirt. Nestled against the warmth of his neck, the cold chain of the time turner sat and Julian fingered it absently.

Yesterday Peter and Julian had been alone in the library, Sirius, James and Remus had gone to retrieve some sweets to eat whilst studying. Julian was reading up about magical beasts, the book was the 1st edition of 'Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them', Jacob's great grandfather's, own school copy.

Julian was so fascinated and intrigued by the pictures that he dropped the book and jumped back when Peter was suddenly sitting extremely close. His beady eyes were on the gold chain that peeked from underneath Julian's shirt.

Julian's head lifted and he leaned back, staring expectantly; coldly at Peter.

"Where'd you get it? What is it?" Peter's first questions did not throw Julian, but nonetheless, he clutched the chain tighter and dropped the pendant lower under his shirt.

"None of your business."

Julian snapped before turning away and picking up his book and returned to reading, but out of the corner of his eye he noticed Peter just kept staring.

He was startled again by Sirius, Remus and James bursting in with an armful of food each.

Peter finally stopped staring.

Julian's baggy pyjamas weren't as baggy as they were on the first night at Potter Manor. Iris and the House Elf's wonderful cooking had filled Julian out and he no longer looked as emaciated or haggard.

He even swore to James that he's grown half an inch. Laughing, Sirius and James picked him up and ran through the halls, laughing raucously that no matter how much he'd grown, he was still a runt.

Smiling, Julian turned to his armoire and carefully selected a green shirt and some play jeans before rolling his eyes to put some socks on. Red suffused his cheeks as he remembered James actually putting socks on his feet like an impudent child.

Surveying the room, he smiled. Jacob clearly insisted he did not make his bed, it was a house rule. So reluctantly he did not make his bed like Sirius and James. The covers piled on top and the lilac sheets in disarray, pillows lying on their sides; he grinned.

Apparently Jacob insisted that Julian grow up like James had, even though he arrived a little too late.

He ran a customary hand through his unruly locks before exiting the room the breakfast hall, what he did not notice was that his precious letter lay peaking out the side from underneath his bed.

He also did not know that hazel eyes narrowed as he stepped out the side door, fully intending to go down to breakfast as well; until he noticed the letter.

_May 1997_

"_I'm fucking sick of your moping Harry!" Ron kicked the metal frame of the cot before turning and cursing. Hermione stood aghast between them, eyes wide; she did not know who to turn to._

_Harry lay on the cot, eyes open, but glassy, clutching the potion vial as though it were something precious._

_Ron turned with a frustrated sigh, looking down at his almost non-existent friend. His blue eyes were ablaze with fury at the selfishness of his best friend, but softened instantly, face relaxing and freckles laying softly against the skin._

_He closed his eyes, before reaching down to pry the vial out of Harry's clutch. In an instant Harry began to wildly hold onto it and Ron began to put more strength into it._

_Hermione stared, stuck on the spot, not knowing whether to intervene. In the end she stayed where she was, she was sick of Harry's moping as well, but she was slightly more sympathetic than Ron. So she watched._

_Ron and Harry continued to struggle until with an angry yell Ron pulled the half empty vial free and threw it to the dirt ground where it smashed, the potion dribbling carelessly over the dirty, soaking into the tufts of grass as it spread._

_Hermione, Ron and Harry stared as the potion spilled across the earth, until Harry, with fire in his eyes, sat up, glared at Ron and marched out of the tent._

"_It needed to be done."_

_July 1976_

Julian sat on the edge of his bed, the mattress sinking towards the floor because the weight of the teenager was on the edge. Night had fallen over Potter Manor, moonlight fanned over Julian's armoire and reflected off his mirror.

Fingers trailed across his forehead as lids gently closed. When they reopened they were blank and dull, in his grip he held a slightly crumpled piece of parchment, candle light flickering over the cream of the paper, highlighting every crease and fold.

With a shuddering gasp Julian stood, the mattress bouncing back to its normal shape as the weight was lifted. Walking over to his desk, he reverently put the parchment down and gently started to erase the creases in the paper, until he was almost furiously rubbing it into the desk.

He had to make it smooth again! He had to fix it! Soon with tears dripping from his eyes and splattering onto the surface of the desk, he emerged. Hands and arms tired from attempting to fix the letter, make it new again, Julian turned to look at his room.

He slumped into the desk chair behind him, the letter sat alone on his desk. How could things have gone so utterly and deplorably wrong?

In the room next to his, James and Sirius had locked the door. 'The Clash' was playing loudly enough to reverberate around even Julian's rooms. But until now he had blocked it out somehow, it flooded his ears, the bass creating vibrations around the candelabras and walls, rattling dimly against wood. The locked door felt like a physical and emotional barrier between them, playing the music loudly as if to drown him out.

His small frame shaking, he stared absently at the small rips and tears marring Severus' scrawl, lines and crumples distorting the flowing hand writing in blank ink.

That morning, Julian had skipped down the stairs, said hello to every painting he had passed and resisted the temptation to slide down the banister. With a gracious smile to Iris and a shy grin to Jacob, he had plopped himself into his kitchen chair and let Iris serve him the finest foods for breakfast.

He noticed that James and Sirius were obviously having a lie in, but adored the silent company of Jacob and Iris. He barely got a moment with them, James and Sirius always bounding around like puppies, lavishing James's parents with love and silliness.

As he served himself some breakfast tea, he was so startled by James' entrance that he nearly dropped the pot. Iris looked up over buttering her scone and Jacob merely lifted an eyebrow before lowering the morning paper.

"What's this?"

James' usually kind hazel eyes were ablaze, with only what could be surmounted as fury.

Julian looked away from his friend's eyes and followed his line of sight to James' hand. In it, clutched in a white knuckled fist was a crisp, white envelope.

Suddenly he was lunging out of his chair, like a bird swooping; dive bombing. Then he was all over James's taller and larger frame, jumping frantically against the other teenager to take back what was his.

"Give it back!"

He was screaming like a high pitched girl and he knew it, but he didn't care.

"Give it back!"

"Give it back now!"

He continued to jump, punching James's with weak fists, shoving until they both toppled over some chairs, Jacob's bellowing and Iris's calm screaming behind them.

On the floor they wrestled on polished timber floor, Julian beating James as hard as he could manage, all the while reaching for his precious letter. James fought back with one arm, the other outstretched like a school yard bully, taller and stronger than his victim.

Jacob was grunting as he tried to pull the lithe body of Julian off his son, he feared that Julian would hurt himself more than James, while Iris stood behind them, not knowing how to intervene, never having seen such a violent brawl in her own house before.

It wasn't until Sirius burst into the kitchen that the scene before him paused.

His best friend, James was on the floor, one arm outstretched with a white envelope clenched in his fist; face red with anger, a rare sight.

On top of James was Julian, straddling the older boy, green eyes narrowed and mouth set in a thin line, reaching for the letter.

His would be father, Jacob, was behind Julian still attempting to pull the smaller boy off his son, sweating and hair in disarray.

Then there was Iris, a gentle hand clutching her throat as she stared at the two on the floor, eyes wide and hands shaking.

Sirius had been getting dressed for breakfast when he had heard noise that might as well have been a banshee! He had hurriedly buttoned his shirt before running down the stairs, two at a time towards the noise, coming from the kitchen.

In the hallways close to the kitchen he heard thumps and things getting knocked over, and that insistent screaming of, "Give it back!"

Sirius had burst into the kitchen, wondering fully, what the hell was going on?

And there he had run into a confusing scene. Suddenly it was as if someone pressed the play button again and the boys were at it again. Iris yelling all the while, worried that either of the boys would be hurt.

Then in all the anger and activity, the envelope ripped open at the side and something like gold glitter burst out and fluttered in the air, the beams of sunlight catching their light and a myriad of gold sparkled around the room.

Everyone paused again, staring; as the gold dust fluttered, then settled on the timber floors.

Weakened, Julian stopped fighting and Jacob lifted him off the bigger boy. Sirius noticed that the younger was red faced and tears streamed down his face, sweaty hair plastered to his forehead and neck.

They all watched as Julian lifted his tearstained face to look at the golden dust littering the floor and surfaces around him. He brushed Jacob's hands off before stumbling back over to James.

"Give it back."

This time it was weaker, defeated and tired. James looked at the letter and the mess around him before handing it back. The emotions flitting in Julian's eyes would have softened him, and almost did.

But as he handed it back, he gave Julian a dark glare before getting up effortlessly, brushing the glittering particles off himself and walked away.

Julian stared at the letter, tears caught in his eyes before running out of the kitchens.

Jacob, Sirius and Iris surveyed the mess around them.

What in Merlin's name just happened?

Julian ran through the back doors, the glass and timber rattling in protest as they were thrown open, only to bounce against the brick of the house. He ran and ran and ran, the wind whipping through his hair, making the sweat cold against his skin.

He broke through the old iron wrung gates that were old and creaking, almost hidden beneath bushes and ran into the Potter Maze.

All the while, tears streaming from his eyes, the solid weight of the key and letter in his hand and a trail of _fragile_, golden glitter behind him….trailing from the envelope to flutter and land on the grass….

He knew that James had seen the signature. Anyone could decipher that as _Severus Snape_. He also knew that while James would not have been able to read the contents of the letter, the signature explained enough.

Seething, James pounded his fist against the brick wall, shaggy hair falling into his eyes behind the frame of his glasses.

He cursed in pain as it throbbed through his fist and nursed it, all the while mumbling to himself. After that huge scene in his mother's kitchen, James was slightly ashamed but it did not measure up to his undeniable anger over the letter.

That morning after he had dressed and fixed a poster that was peeling away from the wall because of a lax sticking charm; he had poked his head into Julian's room to see if he were ready.

Julian was already gone and he grinned at the unmade bed, the only unruly habit that the household wanted the newcomer to pick up. But James frowned when he noticed an envelope peaking out from underneath the bedcovers and mattress.

It looked familiar…

Looking around, James slipped into Julian's blue room and shut the door softly behind him. He looked at Sirius's door, noting it was closed; his best mate would still be in bed, it was way too early for the likes of him.

James turned to look at the hallway door before creeping over to the bed. Automatically looking over his shoulder every time he heard a noise, he knelt beside the mattress and carefully slid the envelope out from underneath the mattress.

In an untidy scrawl that was hardly legible was the name, "Julian Knight".

Now why would Julian have a letter?

Then he remembered, one morning an owl came bearing a letter for Julian, he assumed it was from Headmaster Dumbledore or something like that, but this; this was not the automated scrawl from Hogwarts.

He flipped the envelope over, fully intending to read the letter when something stopped him; his eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets and a terrible anger shook James' body.

_Sender: Severus Septimus Snape_

Without opening the envelope, James tore out of Julian's room, and made a path of anger down the corridors, an ugly fury possessing his face as he burst into the kitchen, envelope crinkled and clutched in his fist that shook.

"What's this?"

And from then on, something that James never imagined would happen; happened.

He remember seeing Julian sitting there, pale with shock and fragile as a baby bird staring into his eyes before his gaze landed on the letter. Then all hell broke loose.

Julian actually _leapt_ out of his chair, it toppled in his wake and James soon found the weight transferred onto his chest. The smaller frame pushing against him scrabbling and jumping upwards, an almost wild, but sad glaze overtaking Julian's eyes.

Then James teetered backwards from a particularly powerful shove from the smaller boy and they crashed onto the timber floor in a clatter as the chair fell with them.

"Give it back!"

James could still hear the shrill scream, as if it reverberated around his head and out across the open lawns of Potter Manor and tunnelled its way through the hedges and bramble of the maze.

At that thought, James turned to look at the mass of dark green that spanned across the back of the Manor behind the gardens and tilted his head. Sparkles of gold flittered and shone from the grass, the particles hiding underneath the strands, the morning dew sticking to them.

He moved forward and across the garden pavements, then finally onto the grass near the entrance of the maze, the dew sticking to his bare feet and grass strands brushing his toes.

Slowly, he followed the trail of particles as they glinted under the morning sun, but paused as the trail entered the start of the maze.

The maze often scared him when he was a child. His father always insisted that it was fun and that he and his brother, Jeremy often played hide and seek in it when they were children. Iris noticed the weary look in her son's eyes and did not ever push James to enter the maze if he did not want to.

He had though, entered it once. The day before leaving for Hogwarts in his first year, his cricket ball had flown into the maze and James, who had been playing against the brick wall alone, had realized that he had to get the ball.

His father would laugh if he said he was far too afraid to retrieve it himself and his mother was ill with the flu. So James had entered the maze, only small within its confines as an eleven year old.

It was dark and musty, and James was almost creeping in it. Afraid to the wake up anything that may have lived in there he walked slowly along the path, searching for his cricket ball.

Sweat began to prickle his neck and cold filled his body, James was almost afraid to breathe. A loud crowing nearby startled James and with a shrill shriek he turned his tail and run; his footsteps pounding the earth.

Once outside and near the house doors he stopped, panting and sweating. A small thump near his feet made him stop; there on the grass was his worn, red cricket ball.

The memory made James pause; his bare foot lingered before stepping down as he entered the maze with a deep breath. The hedges swayed in the morning breeze as James was soon swallowed the by the shadow of the encroaching plants.

**TBC….**

AN: So I thought I'd be mean and leave it there.

I was intending on writing a rather large chapter revealing everything that happened between the fight and up till where Julian is in his room that night, but I thought it would be better as two parts/sections.

From the six month break off writing, I have revised this story and at the moment a lot of ideas are flittering around in my head. I was thinking of putting up a forum to discuss them, but I'm not sure how many people would be interested.

So drop me a line, via a review, I've got some very interesting developments that I'm thinking of introducing.

Yes I know! Lily and Snape haven't been seen for awhile, but if you're lucky you might see them next chapter! We're only in July, so Hogwarts obviously won't be introduced again until September.

About the open poll:

Thanks for voting guys, I'm going to leave it open until I'm ready to write the particular chapter when they do meet, but I am happy to say we do have a clear majority :D

Thankyou very much: **DebsTheSlytherinSnapefan, Fk306 animelover, Chite, CrayonsPink, Twinfetish, DeathNoteMaker, RinafromSTL, crystalbladedragon and Aurora Ivy Fang** for reviewing!

And thankyou to all those lurkers who favourited, alerted or C2-ed this story : ) I appreciate it very much.

It's actually October 2011 right now, I've just revised this chapter, spelling dates etc, and Chapter Ten may be up within the next week at the latest.

Till next time,

~Yun


	10. Part 5 Section II: I Wish

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine, it belongs to J.K Rowling, song lyrics are not mine either, they belong to the related artists each chapter.

**Stand Afar or Take a Chance**

By So Yun

**Part Five, Section II: I wish.**

When the truth is,  
I miss you.  
Yeah the truth is,  
That I miss you so.

And I'm tired,  
I should not have let you go.

So I crawl back into your open arms.  
Yes, I crawl back into your open arms.  
And I crawl back into your open arms.  
Yes, I crawl back into your open arms-Warning Sign, Coldplay

_He broke through the old iron wrung gates that were old and creaking, almost hidden beneath bushes and ran into the Potter Maze._

_All the while, tears streaming from his eyes, the solid weight of the key and letter in his hand and a trail of fragile, golden glitter behind him….trailing from the envelope to flutter and land on the grass…._

_June 1995_

_The hedges were swallowing, eating Cedric. The vines entwining themselves around Cedric's pale flesh; the victim with his face upturned from the thorns and vines, mouth agape, yelling._

_His eyes wide, Harry froze, his wand tip alight, one foot stepping towards the Cup, but his body facing Cedric._

"_Harry! Harry Help me! Help me please!"_

_Cedric's voice penetrated Harry's ears and the foot that was lagging in the direction of the cup turned briskly and Harry dived for Cedric's arms._

_Together, using their combined strength, they pulled the larger boy free. The vines retreated like rats scuttling back into the sewer and Cedric breathed a sigh of relief, wiping at the scratches on his arms._

"_For a moment there, I thought you were going to let it get me."_

_Harry leaned roughly against the hedge, sure that they would not attack and eyed Cedric carefully._

"_For a moment there, so did I."_

_July 1976_

Julian held the envelope loftily in his fingers, sweat staining the paper as the glittering fragments of the time turner slipped out, unnoticed by the distressed boy. His breath came out as harsh pants and he followed his feet with forced energy round and round the hedges. The key was heavy in his hand, clutched so tightly that his knuckles were whitened and he could feel it making an imprint in his hand.

The hedges shifted in the breeze, rustling as if they were alive and Julian shuddered, lost in the memories of his fourth year. The vines brushed against his arms as if comforting him, but their sharp leaves grazed his skin as if to torment him. The grass was moist from a light shower earlier and wet grass stuck to his feet.

Julian didn't know what to think anymore, the comfort that Severus' words had gave him faded into an aching, cold feeling and his chest tightened as he remembered the absolute look of betrayal James had given him. He felt as though the heavens were forcing him to choose between them. What irony, he had chosen Severus over his dead parents in his past life, and now he felt as though he had to choose James over Severus in his life now. The cold chain and heavy weight of the time turner rested almost painfully against his breastbone and he clutched it with one hand, hoping to warm it with his touch. But his hands were just as cold as the metal.

Stumbling over an unseen ditch in the path, Julian fell to his knees painfully and what was left in the envelope came flowing out like a tiny hurricane as flecks of gold swept around him, before gently floating to the ground. The myriad of gold mixed with the drops of moisture clinging to the grass and Julian felt like if he touched it he would ruin the picture. Breathing harshly as he collected himself, Julian neglected to monitor his surroundings and jumped in fright as a hand wrapped around his forearm.

James sighed heavily and rubbed his hand over his forehead and through his unruly hair as he followed the shimmering trail further and further into the maze. Julian's path seemed to be erratic and James wondered if the boy was at least wearing socks as so not to catch a cold. But they would be damp with moisture by now and Julian would be shivering. James' own feet were bare, but he barely felt the cold anymore. But Julian was so fragile, Iris had voiced her fears that Julian's health was not up to par with James' or Sirius' and that they should be careful with him.

Obviously living with a madman and negligent relatives his whole life would have had an effect on hid immune system. It obviously had an effect on Julian's growth, his height was stunted and although he was filling out more, he seemed to still be on the thin side. Sirius and James bulkiness of muscle and growth outweighed Julian as much as Peter's chubbiness did. The only person almost as thin as Julian was Remus, who's change every Full Moon put stress on Remus' growth as well.

The burning anger that James had felt just moments before had faded into concern. Why would Snivellus be writing to their Julian? Was it about what happened at the Ball? Perhaps he and Malfoy were threatened their Julian and they hadn't noticed? Maybe that's why Julian was so upset? How could he have not noticed?

The thoughts flew through James' head and he scolded himself for being so angry with Julian and then the rage returned as he thought of the different spells he could use to dismember Snivellus and Malfoy. Stomping through the wet grass now, he almost fell over his feet as the trail of gold had come to an abrupt stop.

Kneeling in the middle of a meadow of gold dust sat Julian. His head was bowed and his hands clutched the wet grass as if he needed to stabilise himself. James could see Julian's bony, bird like shoulder blades through the thin material of his shirt. The boy's narrow shoulders were turned inwards on himself, huddling for warmth. James paused for a moment before wrapping his warm hand around Julian's skinny forearm. He was cold to the touch and jumped in fright; James was so startled that he withdrew his hand and took a step back.

"Julian?"

Julian turned slowly, easing himself up off his knees and James noted that wet grass clung to his knobbly knees. Julian breathed a loud sigh and clutched his free hand to his chest, his eyes wide like a child who had just discovered a ghoul.

"Oh. It's just you."

James almost sneered at the response but forced himself to soften his features, and once again gently reached for Julian forearm. Julian didn't flinch this time, but looked at the hand on his forearm with detached interest.

James took a risk and pulled Julian forth into an impromptu hug, and as he carded his hand through the younger boy's hair, his heart clenched at even the thought of the anger that he had unleashed on Julian earlier.

"Julian I'm so sorry, it was wrong of me to go through your private possession and steal them. But if Sniv-….Snape is threatening you or something, you have to tell us!"

The last few words came out in a rush and he felt Julian pushed against his chest, so he released him and was shocked at the blatant fury that burned in Julian's green eyes. Julian's body language was terse and he visibly shook and he crossed his arms, and looked away as if to contain his anger at James.

Breathing through his nose harshly, Julian turned back to James. James' eyes widened, he was completely unprepared, having never seen Julian this angry, or even angry at all!

"You had no right James! You had no damn right to rifle through my possession and make stupid assumptions from them! You had no right!"

Julian's arms were flailing around wildly by the end of his speech and James' eyebrows had almost risen above his hairline, Julian sure was a damn spitfire when he got going! His chest heaved and he let the breath out through his nose; eyes narrowed as James spluttered for an explanation. The younger boy's folded arms and terse stance reminded his comically of his own mother's and James coughed to hide a laugh.

_Wrong time James, wrong time._

Throwing his hands up in a show of peace, when Julian's eyes narrowed at his badly disguised laugh, he turned back to the situation at hand. Julian still looked terribly angry, but all James had been doing was protecting him!

"Jules," He started softly, as if he were talking to a frightened animal, "you're absolutely one hundred per cent correct, I had no right and it was wrong of me to do so. I promise I won't do it again." He tried plaintively, watching Julian's fury melt into an expression of contemplative anger. The younger boy was also unconsciously rubbing his arms as if beetles were crawling on them.

"But, as every friend should do, I was worried for your safety. Sniv- Snape is not a good person Julian. He's a sneaky, slimy, conniving little snake, you don't know what he's up to!"

James barely realised that even the thought of Snape got him so revved up, that by the end of it, it was he who was shaking in fury now; not Julian. But Julian didn't stay contemplative for long, after James' little rant, anger quickly marred his features once again.

"You're such a judgemental prat! You judge books by their covers! You think you're so much better than everyone!"

Julian was almost screaming now, breathing heavily, his heart racing. He knew that this was James his father, his friend who had shown him so much kindness that dispelled the horrible stories from the pensieve in fifth year. But it all came rushing back, he _knew_ Severus, he knew Severus had been tormented by James his entire schooling life, undeserving and that's why he treated the Marauders with such disdain! Julian remembered with horrific clarity the accusations that Severus had thrown at him about his father in the potions classroom that day. He also remembered how vehemently he defended his father, and Sirius. God, if only James didn't have to prove it to be so true!

"Excuse me?" James' eyes narrowed to dangerous slits in indignation of sweet little Julian screaming such things at him. James ignored the tiny flinch Julian gave and let out a sharp, loud breath from his nose like a bull. Julian stood before him, shaking slightly, and his olive eyes swirled with a timid fear; but apart from those small signs he stood before his friend strong and indignant. While he was glad to see Julian was able to stand up for himself, the cause for his ire was completely lost on James.

If anything, James was the one who had more right to be angry. Why in bleeding hell was Julian corresponding with Snape? He had barely spoken to the other guy, except for some heated words at a ball!

Julian chose to say nothing; James would never have understood, even if he had made up another fabricated story. His shoulders sagged with weariness, and he looked at James in the eyes before dropping his gaze to the grassy floor of the maze and closing his mouth.

"Whatever." James managed to say before whirling around to leave the maze.

The abruptness of James' statement and leaving stung Julian leaving him bereft. He recoiled emotionally, eyes burning at the disbelief that James would just dismiss him like that. He watched the older boy stride purposefully around the corner before taking in a shuddering breath.

He couldn't believe he just fought with his father and friend. That hurt a lot more than he thought any emotion ever could. It was almost as his fierce, hurtful fight that he had had with Ron before he went on the raid. Ron had been killed while he was sleeping; he never got to say goodbye and the fight they had, haunted him for a long time.

_May 1997_

"_I see him every night Harry, like a creeper, in your tent watching you. It's plain sick mate. He was our professor! He's an adult, he has not right to watch you like that."_

_Ron vehement tone broke through Harry's thoughts and he turned a quizzical brow to his best friend. Ron's fists were clenched like a toddler's, face bright red matching his hair and that dangerous look in his electric blue eyes. Harry took in a deep breath as he clutched the blanket on his lap and looked away, huffing slightly. He was almost too tired to be annoyed._

"_Ron, Severus is looking out for me. He is the one who… you know, rescued me. He understands what I've been through. I wish you wouldn't bad mouth him so much, you owe him gratitude for the amount of times he's saved your arse, and mine you know."_

_Harry finished the statement softly, and sent a deploring look to his friend. His fragility bled through in his pain stricken green eyes and the weariness of his posture. The plastic chair did nothing to support him, the chair encroaching his tiny, malnourished frame. The blanket had been knitted by Hermione and kept Harry warm; ever since his capture he had felt the chill more than others even in the summer warmth._

_Ron almost looked apologetic for his tirade, his eyes softening at the poor state of his closest friend. But he continued on; this time a little more tentatively, but angry enough to get his point across;_

"_But Harry, it isn't right that you should rely on him like that. He may have switched to the Light, but he's not a good role model… he's done some bad things."_

"_We've all done bad things Ron, like you're doing right now. It's okay for you to say that, you have two loving parents, a million caring brothers and a sister who you can rely on. Severus is the best thing that has happened to me; he's taking care of me."_

"_I'm sorry Harry, but I just don't approve! He was such a greasy git to us in Hogwarts, especially to you! I don't trust him. Don't come crying to me when he hurts you."_

"_I don't need your approval Ron. Go away."_

_Harry closed his eyes as his best friend shuffled away; sleep closing in on him as he clutched the blanket a little closer._

_Ron left for the raid while he was asleep. He never felt the slightest brush of Ron's hand on his shoulder and the sad smile he gave Harry before he left._

July 1976

Julian sat on the edge of his bed, the mattress sinking towards the floor because the weight of the teenager was on the edge. Night had fallen over Potter Manor, moonlight fanned over Julian's armoire and reflected off his mirror.

Fingers trailed across his forehead as lids gently closed. When they reopened they were blank and dull, in his grip he held a slightly crumpled piece of parchment, candle light flickering over the cream of the paper, highlighting every crease and fold.

With a shuddering gasp Julian stood, the mattress bouncing back to its normal shape as the weight was lifted. Walking over to his desk, he reverently put the parchment down and gently started to erase the creases in the paper, until he was almost furiously rubbing it into the desk.

He had to make it smooth again! He had to fix it! Soon with tears dripping from his eyes and splattering onto the surface of the desk, he emerged. Hands and arms tired from attempting to fix the letter, make it new again, Julian turned to look at his room.

He slumped into the desk chair behind him, the letter sat alone on his desk. How could things have gone so utterly and deplorably wrong?

In the room next to his, James and Sirius had locked the door. 'The Clash' was playing loudly enough to reverberate around even Julian's rooms. But until now he had blocked it out somehow, it flooded his ears, the bass creating vibrations around the candelabras and walls, rattling dimly against wood. The locked door felt like a physical and emotional barrier between them, playing the music loudly as if to drown him out.

James must have told Sirius what happened and he decided to side with James. Julian didn't blame him though, Julian had barely spent two months with the boys despite the closeness between them all. But it still hurt, like an open wound with ocean water being poured over it; throbbing on and off in the background. He could randomly hear loud bursts of their laughter of the music, and tell tale thumps of them play wrestling.

Julian had skipped dinner much to the concern of Iris who had checked on him briefly before leaving reluctantly after Julian told her he had a large afternoon snack. Julian was rather good at lying to cover up issues, he didn't like making a big drama and it wouldn't do to worry Iris when she had done so much for him. He also did not want to sour the relationship in the Potter Manor if she or Jacob caught wind of the fight between the boys. He knew that they would side with James of course; and he wouldn't blame them either.

A particularly loud thump from the wall next door made Julian jump and clutch the letter, creasing it again. He sighed before pushing it under a backboard compartment in the base of his drawer, he was sure James knew of the compartment but he wouldn't dare rifle through Julian's things again.

Julian got up and quietly wandered over to the closed door and gently leant his ear against it, if only to hear the comforting voices of his father and Godfather, now talking quietly. It only sounded like quiet murmuring and he wasn't even trying to hear what they were saying, but he felt connected. He smiled sadly and wandered over to his bed, where he curled up under his duvet, clutching it tightly, tears rolling down his cheeks and soaking into the sheets and pillow. Julian fell into a restless sleep and dreams of a mixture from the Third Task maze, his fight with Ron bleeding into his fight with James, and visions of a death Ron staring up at him from behind a bush, his electric blue eyes, dull and lifeless.

_I wish you were here._

What he didn't know was, James had made the door translucent so he could subtly check on Julian, so he saw the entire action. With sagging shoulders he made the door solid again and continued talking to Sirius; carefully evading the topic of the fight in the maze, wondering how on earth it got to this state.

Hi everyone, I know it's been two and half years but after reading through reviews for this story, I became very enthusiastic about taking up this story again considering the Summer holidays (in Australia) start in less than a month, so I'll have three and a half months free to work and write.

I know this chapter isn't very dramatic, and I still haven't introduced Lily and Severus yet, or even close to Hogwarts, but I'm trying to do some character and relationship building. I was going to keep writing this chapter, but I think I'll leave it here and write Chapter 11 next week and make it dramatic.

I hope you guys like this after such a long time, my writing style may have changed slightly but I still hope you enjoy it. If you have any suggestions regarding the plot and story, I'm open for suggestions : )

Thanks for reading,

~Yun


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